Quote Originally Posted by Darth Ultron View Post
73.) Cows of Chaos
Conjuration(Summoning, Chaos)
Level: Clr 3,Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, F/DF
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Close
Effect: a herd of Chaos Cows
Duration: 3 rounds/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

This spell summons a herd of Chaos Cows, female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. The Chaos Cows appear where the caster designates, but no two can be farther apart then 30 feet. The spell summons six Chaos Cows, plus one Chaos Cow per caster level. The Chaos Cows are passive and non aggressive, and simply mull about the area. A Chaos Cow will only fight if directly attacked first. The caster has no control over the Chaos Cows summoned by this spell.
Mostly the Chaos Cows get in the way, take up space, make noise and eat nearby grass. They do provide quite a distraction, and it is possible to make them stampede.
Focus: a bag and a bit of hay or grass.

Notes: An ancient elven spell created to annoy other races, but particularity humans, dwarves and orcs.


Chaos Cow
Magical Beast(Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 5d8+15 (37 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 40 feet
Armor Class: 13 (-1 size, +4 natural), touch 9, flat-footed13
Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+13
Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Full Attack: Gore +8 melee (1d8+9)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Smite Law, Stampede
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60’, Resistance to acid 5, cold 5, electricity 5, fire 5, and sonic 5, Fast Healing 1, Immunity to polymorph and petrification.
Saves: Fort +7, Ref +4, Will +1
Abilities: Str 22, Dex 10, Con 16, Int 3, Wis 11, Cha 4
Skills: Listen +7, Spot +5
Feats: Alertness, Endurance
Environment: Chaotic Planes
Organization: Herd
Challenge Rating: 3
Treasure: none
Alignment: Chaotic
Advancement: -

The Chaos Cows a female bovines from the elven plane of Arvandor. A Chaos Cow stands more than 6 feet tall at the shoulder and is 9 to 12 feet long. It weighs 1,800 to 2,400 pounds.

Smite Law (Su): Once per day, an anarchic creature can make a normal attack to deal extra damage equal to its Hit Dice (maximum 20 points) against a lawful opponent.
Stampede (Ex): A frightened herd of bison flees as a group in a random direction (but always away from the perceived source of danger). They literally run over anything of Large size or smaller that gets in their way, dealing 1d12 points of damage for each five bison in the herd (Reflex DC 18 half ). The save DC is Strength-based.
Now my hobgoblins have a favorite food. Imagine the fun as ranks of hobgoblin archers and spearmen line up against a stampede of chaos cows.

Bonus: stylisly colored leather goods!