A remote Republic base on the frozen world of Orto Plutonia has ceased communication and Obi-Wan, Anakin and Rex have been sent to investigate with an array (three dropships worth) of clones. Also present are representative from the planet's moon (called Pantora), Supreme Chairman Cho and Senator Chuchi (plus two bodyguards). C3-PO and R2 are also there, why not? Turns out the planet is uninhabited meaning the Pantorian as the only intelligent species of the system claim it as their own. Kenobi thinks this is for the Senate to decide but Senator Chichu meekly points out that the Senate already granted the system to the Pantorians. Makes sense to me. If we ever meet extra-stellar lifeforms I'd hope they'll recognize that the solar system is ours to
exploit ruin **** up use. Chairman Cho seems to be under the impression that everybody around here answers to his authority. OBi-Wan and Anakin are freezing their butts off and joking about how they're in the tropics and how this isn't Tattoine at all. So is this post-character development or are just in a good mood today? Rex is wearing some proto snow-trooper armor which is nice but makes it look like he's got no chin which makes it hard to take him seriously in this.
The fun soon stops when the crew discovers a row of clone helmets on spears on the entrance and a lot more dead clones inside. None of which are missing their helmets which goes completely unadress but makes me wonders if their ennemis own an ewok recipe book. Chairman Cho is adamant the Separatists are responsible and wipes Senator Chuchi argument that there are no droid remains anywhere nor any blaster marks on the casualties by stating that he's lead their people since before she was a child. She adresses him as "your majesty" and she is a senator despite looking and acting like a teenager which is reminding me of Naboo's nonsensical political traditions of
electing a teenage queen. Obi-Wan notices that the base computer were left untouched which is unlike the Separatists. Chichu hopes that if the Separatists aren't involved then maybe a peaceful solution can be reached. Cho argues that even if the Separatists aren't behind this then whoever is is clearly a brutal agressor who must be put down and that he is ready to die for his people so it is time chichu asks herself if she is brave enough to do the same. Rex reports that the scouts have spotted a Separatist base not far from there. Must have made for some awkward "meet the neighbours." Anakin and Obi-Wan takes a little group and go investigate while the rest stays behind to protect the Pantorians.
The Separatist base is in similar condition with droid heads stuck to spears and their headless bodies frozen in place. And now I'm imagining the attackers propping them up and having fun just like with huge legos. Anakin spots a big fottprint and Obi-Wan orders a cast to be made out of it. Nothing comes of this but I guess it was left by one of the mounts we'll see soon. Obi-Wan finds a recording (that only plays after Skywalker whacks the projector) of the droid commander calling for reinforcement before being tackled by a polar bear-like alien. Guess no Separatists ever got the message. They keep on exploring and stumble on a village. (Did they follow tracks? I don't think so.) turns-out the planet is inhabited by a pre-smelting civilisation of furry, four-eyed humanoids. I swear I've seen these guys before in
Star Wars but I'm not sure where. The cantina? They can't talk Basic, though, Skywalker laments that they could use 3PO right now as what looks like a leader (you can tell by the hat, it's an universal law that the fancier the hat the more importance you think you have) approaches and raises a spear menacingly before sticking it in the snow and inviting them in their hut. Kenobi hopes that the aliens are smarter than the Jedi and will figure a way to communicate. Obi-Wan tries the talk-slowly-to-foreigner technique. It works as well as you'd expect. Fortunately, an alien hands Anakin a drawing of a battle droid before Kenobi tries shouting at them and Skywalker draws a (crude) human and alien holding hands to try to convey the meaning of "peace". Fortunetaly this is not how these aliens challenge each other to an honor duel so that works. The leader hugs Obi-Wan as they leave.
The Jedi are surprised by a snostorm on the way back to the Republic base but make it without too much trouble. They inform everybody that the planet is inhabited which sends Chairman Cho into a furor. It's never adressed but his flurry of arguments as to why "savages" don't count as people makes me suspect he already knew about their presence. Senator Chichu didn't but he shouts her into submission. The Jedi explains that the natives are called Thals. (Ah! so that's why they disappeared from
Doctro Who! Clever the onmy safe distance from a Dalek
is inanother franchise altogether. Ahh, who am I kidding, I'm sure there's a
Doctor who/
tar Wars crossover somewhere.) Their leader's name is Tay Senn and they've agreed to a meeting. Turns out the droid attacked them first and they mistook the clones for allies of the Separatists (since they're all foreign-devils and all that). Now watching this I assumed that the Jedi where making stuff up to try to calm down the Chairman and gain time for a Senatorial commission to recognize the natives' right to the planet, but nope, this is all accurate. How the hell did they communicate
that through drawings?
Anyhoo, every named character, the two bodyguards and some clone goes to the meeting. Chairman Cho, who overruled Senator Chichu who had volunteered as their people's spokesperson wants the clones to open fire on the natives as soon as they show up but Kenobi points out that he's not in command and Skywalker that some thals have been following them for a while. More pop out of the snow and Tay Senn shows up.It starts well enough with Tay Senn welcoming everyone to his planet and expressing he intends to be a good neighbour but on the condition the aliens leave his planet to his people. How does this guy even have a concept of planet? Chairman Cho uses 3PO as a translator to hurl some abuse at the natives befoe declaring war before storming off. The only alien left is Senator Chichu who is dejected by the whole thing. The Jedi ask her if she can't appeal to the senate so that they'd get authority to intervene. She can't without Cho's authorization... or the Speaker of the Assembly's. So this is a constitutional monarchy, then?
As they get up to base they meet Cho gearing up for war. Well trying to at any rate. tHere's a running gag of Cho ordering Rex around and Rex not contradicting but also not obeying until a Jedi Gives him the same order which Cho never seems to notice. This time though Rex asks Anakin what he's supposed to do. Anakin tells him to protect Cho if needed but not go any farther Probaly because as much a she doesn't want to start a war, losing a head of state would look bad on the after-mission debrief. the Chairman seems fixated on launching an immediate attack even though the snowstorm means their dropship are inoperable and there are only less than twenty speeders. Naturally someone with such a keen tactical mind falls into the most obvious trap this side of the Maw cluster and the thals starts slaughtering the clones and Cho's bodyguards. Cho even gets a spear to the back but when Rex picks him up he has no wound nor bleeding visible. Woops. Chichu managed to get in touch with the Pantorian Assembly and they've decided that Cho's actions were out of line, she's given full plenipotential authority to salvage the situation. Holy cow a romm full of politicians who managed to decide to do the right thing immediately and with little incentive to do so!? These
are inhuman creatures! As the storm has died down, the Jedi and everybody else take the gunships and while en route Chichu confides to Kenobi that she hopes
he would managed to make the peace. Kenobi answers that this war is between the thals and the Pantorians and so it has to be her who speaks for her onw people. I get what they're going for but isn't being an in-betweener in theses kind of conflicts the entire reason the Republic funded your huge-ass temple for a thousand years, Obi-Wan?
Rex, five clones and the useless load have managed to flee to some natural ice bridge but it collapses under two speeders (how does antigravity even work?). Rex quickly pulls up an impromptu defense with the speeders and starts gunning down the approaching outriders. Turns out that while stone beats laser when stone has literally all the circumstance adva,tage (terrain, surprise, elevation, surrounding the ennemy, numbers, etc.) and cavalry charge against ennmies with automatic firearms on a flat terrain isn't exactly ideal. Tay Senn has a huge numerical advantage and it loo,s like the clones can't gun down all of his warriors before being turned into Kamino-special kebabs but they can gun down
a lot of his warriors. And they do. The battle is interrupted by the timely arrival of the gunships which prompts Tay Senn to halt his charge but not to run away just yet.
Chairman Cho is elated to see Senator Chichu and orders her, as his dying command, to avenge his fall and wipe out the natives. She cooly tell him he has been deposed and she intends to make peace. He recoils and shock and re-affirm his commitment to dying for his nation. Which he promptly does. Convienient. I am compelled to quote the movie
Rrrrrr when they bury the guy who took himself hostage and then executed his hostage when his demands weren't met "He said he'd do it and so he did. He was a great man. -He was great dumbass is what you mean, yeah." Chichu takes Cho's big Hat of Leadership (see? I told you it was universal) and a thrown spear before ordering 3PO to come with. Tai Senn meets her halfway across the battlefield and she raises the spear up high saying it is a hard thing to die for one's people, but living for them is harder and she drives the spear into the ground before placing the Cho's hat on it. She says she chooses to live and asks Tai Senn what he chooses. Tay Senn raises his spear menacingly growls something... and drives it into the snow next to Chichu's ans 3PO exclaims that he choses to live.
The outriders all make their mounts kneel. Glad we solved racism forever guys!
I kid but Obi-Wan quickly makes Chichu promises to do something both harder and more important than making a peace. Keeping a peace. And to such a peace that it will be held up as example throughout the galaxy. She clearly understands the difficulty of the task but promises anyway.
Our last shot of the episode is of the two crossed spears in the snow with Cho's hat flapping in the wind.
Re: Fyraltari watches The Clone Wars (2008) for the first time
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