Quote Originally Posted by Unoriginal View Post
Between this, the fact that you get blamed for going too hard and too easy wit no middle ground, the fact that the one player comfortable with talking in-character goes into self-depreciating tirades when he doesn't figure out something, and the new player who you describes as trying to gaslight you...

Have you considered the idea that the relationship between you and those players is just toxic and you shouldn't play with them?

Because what you have here is neither a good gaming situation nor a good relationship.
Plus, apparently, everyone has their phone out all the time. Again in my experience (which is all I have to go on!) people don't pull their phones out at the table unless they're bored enough or pissed off enough to disassociate. Someone looking at their phone for longer than it takes to read a text is a sign to me that I need to move things along, someone's bored or feels left out.

If people aren't absorbing the information, aren't engaging with the world, aren't chatting and bantering with each other and are looking at their phones too much to pay attention -- is anyone having any fun?