Ionathus's Random Banter #249 -- Directionless Rambling Is Now Mandatory

[Ionathus]

There's a whole lot of you, I'm still trying to work out why.

Oh, that one's easy. Every time a Dave Matthews song plays, a straight baby pops into existence at a Panera Bread somewhere.

They just hand it over with your order and it's yours now! Care is relatively straightforward: feed it Lunchables and Pop-Tarts until it turns 12, then Pizza Rolls after that until it graduates.

My working theory is that it's a defence mechanism by the law of narrative causality to ensure the continued existence of love triangles.

Wouldn't more heterosexual people mean less potential love triangles since there would be less possible combinations of people being into each other?

Big pet peeve of mine: love triangles are almost always a misnomer. Those depicted in fiction are overwhelmingly a love angle, with two people competing over the third. This is usually boring and contrived melodrama, and the narrative pressure of "being fought over" almost never does the vertex character justice since they have to be wishy-washy to drag out the story.

I'm reading a court romance / fantasy novel right now, and all three of the leads are the same gender. I have high hopes to finally see a true love triangle in fiction.