Sword of Dragon Laying: Functions as a normal +5 sword, until the wielder encounters a dragon. At which point it casts charm person on both the wielder and the dragon to convince them to have sexual relations (bypasses SR, DC 50 save). If the two are both of the same sex, the sword will reverse the gender of the wielder for the length of a potential pregnancy +1d12 months. If one of the parties gets pregnant, the sword casts Geas on the female party to make her carry the child to term (she resists all attempts to get her to get rid of the child, or polymorph her back into her original form if shifted)
...So totally going to use this.

Hey ABD! *Sword activates*