KuReshtin's Vociferously Ruminating Harbinger of Random Banter - #147

[KuReshtin]

I wha huh buh fuh... How does that work? What's the point of deep-frying lettuce?

You deep fry the lettuce to make it extra crispy. Everyone likes crispy letuce, right?

Scotland. Scotland needs no point. They'll deep-fry anything. And I know for a fact that they deep-fry haggis as well.

True. Most chippies here have deep fried haggis.

I mean, you can take anything to a chippie in Scotland, and they'll fry it for you.
And yes, they'll re-fry fish and chips.
My Dad was in Scotland getting fish and chips for dinner (his iob takes him all over the country) and a man walked in with a donner kebab and a pre-cooked pizza.
He wrapped the kebab in the pizza, gave it to the counter lady and said, "Can you toss us 'at in the fryer [Lady's name]?"
And she did.
And he started eating it, and Dad iust staaared.
After the man had left the chippie she turned to Dad and said, "We call that a heart attack special. He has one every week. Our regulars are running bets on when he drops dead rom heart failure."

That sounds like something they'd do up here in Scotland.

What about mushrooms? They are delicious deep fried too.

That's what they call a mushroom pakora here.
Take a whole mushroom. Dip it in batter. Fry it. Done.

"You don't ask why haggis is disgusting or why nothing is worn under a kilt. Don't ask why I play bagpipes."

But.. but.. But... Haggis is delicious.

Convenience.

The bagpipes aren't as bad as everyone makes them out to be.