[House][Template][Competions] Pie-Eatin' Hoedown!

[Treguard]

Whatever convinced you that this was a quick, easy way to earn 500GP isn't letting itself be heard over the din of the crowd as you take your seat opposite the smug, huge-bellied half-orc; the current unbeaten champion and, unfortunately, your opponent. The rowdy audience's excitement is pitched as the doors to the inn's kitchen swing open; your eyes open wide and your nostrils twinge as from the kitchen stagger two serving dwarves bearing the load of two enormous pies. The massive half-orc, grinning, starts to clap as the pies totter their way slowly to the table, the crowd quickly following in unison.

Your party, barely visible in the throng of bodies and clouds of pipesmoke, whistle and cheer your name but their voices are lost when a dwarf leaps onto the table and addresses the tavern, "Ladies and Gen'leman! Does our challenger dare think that they can out-stomach our local champion, "Gurak, the Unending Eater?!". The crowd cheers and bets are made as a huge pie is shoved in front of you, the malodorous smell assailing your nose as you clutch your spoon, ready to do battle. The referee and announcer finally manages to make himself heard over the hubbub, "And now with betting for the Rat, Leek and Parsnip Pie round over, the contestants may begin eating... Now!"

Now okay I admit this isn't an everyday occurence in a DnD adventure, sure, but think about in films and books where the hero, in order to win acceptance for his party, must pass some bizarre yet culturally significant test. Be it knocking back firewater with the village chief, log rolling, dancing, whatever backwater sport pleases the locals. I can't remember exactly where I read something similar to the above scenario but it always tickled me when playing that scene, so I thought I'd translate it to D20.

Pie Eatin' 101
Okay, first off the subjects involved.

The Pie: It's big. It's bad. And it's all yours. Normally something not too pleasant but the filling is only for flavour (arf arf) and may or may not be significant. Each pie has 100 "hit points".

The Opponent: Naturally up to the DM; make him as large and obnoxious as you like or throw your PCs by making him small and unassuming, yet the unbeaten champion and record-holder ("My Gods! Where is he putting it all?!"). The crowd naturally side with him whoever he is. Will require some NPC stats rolled.

The Crowds: Will play a not insignificant part to the affair and will have it's own topic further down.

The Rest of the Party: Don't just think because you got lucky you can just sit this out! They too can have an impact on the contest.

The Rules
The winner of the contest is simply the person who finishes their pie first. Contestants are disqualified if any pie touches the floor, throw up or pass out (especially both) meaning they forfeit the competition. Both contestants start at the same time. Now because this is more than anything a gruelling test of stamina a constitution-based check is made at the start of each "combat round", the drive that forces you to pick up your spoon and eat eat EAT, against the pie's DC. At the start of the contest the pie has a paltry DC (5) but after every four successful rounds the DC gains +2, indicating fullness, an unwillingess to continue etc.

If the CON-save is successful: You plunge your spoon into the bubbling mass and pull out a steaming heap of goodness, whereupon it is clamped down upon and (forcibly) swalllowed. How big is that spoonful? The damage done to the pie is measured with 2d6. Deduct that value from the pie's total hit points of 100; this is repeated for both you and your opponent until the pie has a total of 0.

If the CON-save is a failure: Maybe it was the chunk of fatty gristle that you had to force down, or maybe the startling conclusion that even to this day you still hate mushrooms, but you pause and start to heave, much to the crowd's amusement.. Make a fort save, DC (10 + 2 per every failed CON-save). If you make the save you pause and catch your breath, plunging your spoon in again to the sound of cheering. You don't inflict any damage to the pie this round but can particpate in the next. If you fail then you become visibly sickened; you sway in your seat, your eyes water and your stomach flip flops in fear of the next spoonful. You gain 1 point of temporary CON damage which lasts for the whole remainder of the contest and if your next round is successful then you can only roll 1d6 of pie damage. The subsequent rounds are all normal (except for the aforementioned CON damage)

If the fort-save is failed a second time, then that's it. Your spoon clatters to the floor as you let forth the contents of your stomach. The crowd's mockery ringing in your ears. The contest is over and you are indeed the loser. Dun dun dunnn.

If you reach zero first, then you win! Slowly rise to face the crowds as the newly appointed Lord of the Pies! Revel in the power.. the powweeer- of course, if the same fate above happens to your opponent then it's an automatic victory to you, huzzah! Unfortunately he has a little bit of help on his side...

(On a side note, due to the fact that you've been effectively stuffing yourself silly, whether the PC wins or loses they become "fatigued" until the end of the day, big meal and all y'know.. :P)

Winning the Crowd
The crowd's reaction to the contest is an important one. The more people supporting you, the better motivated you feel and the more you can accomplish. Unfortunately for you the crowd's favour is against the player as they are more compelled to side with the champion. This initial level of favour for your opponent can be quantified thusly:

If the opponent is a recent champion: +1
If the opponent is a minor local personality: +2
If the opponent has never been beaten or is a big local personality: +3
If the opponent is a local hero or a leading figurehead of the community: +4

You effectively start at +0 (and that's even with your party cheering you on). What this crowd modifier represents is a bonus to any stat-based saved as well as for any "damage" rolls. I use the term "damage" loosely as this crowd modifier can apply to any competition, the pie eating competition is just an example of mine. All is not lost for your players though! By drumming up additional support from the sidelines, the rest of the party can swing the crowd to the competing PC's advantage. How is this achieved? By making bluff, perform, diplomacy or heck, even intimidate checks they can spur, cajole or even coerce the crowd into thinking the PC is the best beaver-hurler, shot-drinker, chilli-eater etc etc in the whole goddamn world! Normal rules apply for each skill check, except retakes are permitted for things like intimidate as the player would be working with a whole crowd and not just a single person. The crowd's DC for any of these checks is a DC (15 +2 per failed check); the same DC to alter a persons mood from indifferent to friendly.

The size of the crowd is important too, as the more people that have to be swayed the greater the task of spurring them to cheer for your side. For simplicity's sake I've merely grouped situations into having large or small crowds, with large crowds (a large, busy city inn full with patrons or a bustling marketplace as examples) adding +2 to the original crowd DC. For every successful skill check made by a non-competing PC, then that character adds a +1 crowd modifier to the competing PCs' rolls to be applied to the competitor's next round. Only one bonus can be added per party member, as that bonus represent how they spend the duration of the contest whipping up the crowd via their skill.

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.. Well there you go! I would really appreciate some honest commenty and criticism on this template of mine, heck a playtest would be brilliant as I'm woefully lacking in the D&D department here. The numbers and bits can be changed to suit the DMs taste but I think that they'll be acceptable. Thanks for reading!

edit: Fixed typos.. prolly more here and there that I can't see..

[Lord Iames Osari]

NICE. ;D All Hail Sir Frinsdale, Slayer of Dragons and Eater of Pies! ... Wait...

I really like it. The mechanics look solid to me.

[martyboy74]

This is awesome! Can the DM have different fillings do different things, like give the pie DR? ;D

[chaiyo]

You, sir, are one of the greatest Pie Advocates of our time. The next step, is, of course, pie fights. Or just general food fight rules. In fact, food is a neglected part of D&D, even though genius such as this can accompany it.

That said, I would like to now spread this to all players of D&D throughout the land. That somehow don't have internet.

[El Jaspero, the Pirate King]

Perhaps certain races might get racial modifiers to their pie-damage checks; elves, for instance, would tend to be dainty eaters whereas an ogre has a huge mouth and bad table manners.

[Treguard]

Thanks for the good reception, guys. I had visions of this being shot down in flames but I guess I worry too much. I guess I was onto something when I thought DnD could use more non combat-oriented tests, and I'm sick of riddles, mate.

This is awesome! Can the DM have different fillings do different things, like give the pie DR? ;D

If a DM was feeling sadistic or wanted to rig the contest for a plot device, "Dwarven Stonecrust" springs to mind ;).

Perhaps certain races might get racial modifiers to their pie-damage checks; elves, for instance, would tend to be dainty eaters whereas an ogre has a huge mouth and bad table manners.

Pah! Those pantywaist elves wouldn't stand a chance against the sheer gut power of a dwarf, orc or ogre (omg racialist).. Halflings maybe..

[The Demented One]

Ooh! Ooh! Variant pies!

Dwarven Stonecrust
Baked to the point of near-petrification and stuffed nearly twice as dense as most pies, Dwarven Stonecrust is recognized as one of the greatest challenges any pie-eater will ever face. Dwarven Stonecrust pie has DR 10/adamantine and 150 hit points. The use of adamantine spoons can bypass the pie's damage reduction, but this is generally seen as unfair, and a waste of good adamantine.

Alchemist's Surprise
With Alchemist's Fire baked into it, eating this is not generally seen as a good idea^TM. Every bite of Alchemist's Surprise deals 1 point of non-lethal fire damage to the bite-taker.

Elven Dainties
Favored by elves--pansies!--these light pies are recognized by most pie-eaters as not even a challenge. An Elven Dainty has only 30 hp. In addition, the DC of its Con save starts at 3, and increases by 1 every round, rather than starting at 5 and increasing by 2.

[MagFlare]

Can you use Power Attack on the pie? How about Spirited Charge? Maybe Smite Evi, provided TDO can whip up an eeevil pie concept?

And while we're on the subject, can it be a Fort save rather than a Con check? Please? I just think it'd be the very apex of comedy if a Paladin's Divine Grace allowed him to become the champion pie-eater in the kingdom.

"I am Sir Pelegrir the Gravy-Stained, Scourge of Church Dinners!"

[MagFlare]

To hell with waiting. In the vein of TDO's pie variants, here is...

The Hellpie
Stuffed with the hearts of orphans and seasoned with brimstone, the Hellpie radiates evil. A good character takes a -1 morale penalty to his Con check when tucking into one of these fearsome pastries. But do not abandon hope, heroes: the pie is vulnerable to Smite Evil, meaning that your high-level Pally ought to be able to get through this thing faster than a bran muffin through a short grandmother.

And while I'm at it...

Gnomish Sur-pies
As an ordinary pie, but roll a d20 when it's finished. On a roll of 1, the pie explodes, dealing 6d6 damage to its eater and 2d6 damage to everyone else in a 20 foot radius (Ref half). Those wacky gnomes!

[martyboy74]

You should also create a pie of good that is vulnerable to Smite Good, for al htose evil characters.