The apparatus of Kwalish

[Doomboy911]

I'm having trouble finding information on it so I have three questions.
What book is it in?
What is it's movement speed?
And why is it apparently terrible?

[Zaq]

It's in the DMG. Here's the SRD version. It's terrible because it's way overpriced, it takes way too many actions to do anything (A full-round action to move or to turn? Even with two characters burning their actions on it, that sucks), it's not big enough to carry your party anywhere interesting (so you can't use it as a mobile base of operations or an exploration vehicle, because you can't fit inside it), and it's no good in combat (+12 to hit with 2d8 damage is godawful by the time you can afford 90k gp). So it's no good for exploration, it's no good in combat, it's hella expensive, and overall it's just not that interesting.

If the whole party could fit inside, it wouldn't be worth the purchase price, but it would at least be nifty to use as a base or as an exploratory vehicle. If I were a GM, I might consider giving it to a party just for kicks. With only two people fitting inside, though? Not so much. It'd be more trouble than it's worth just to keep it with you, either lugging around a 500 pound barrel (Bags of Holding do have limits) or slowing your travel speed to 20 feet per round while it trundles along behind you. It's pretty much a total failure as an item.

[true_shinken]

How about a bunch of pixies 'driving' this? Could be scary.

[Urpriest]

How about a bunch of pixies 'driving' this? Could be scary.

If you want to do something like that, just get a self-propelled Halfling War Wagon.

[The Big Dice]

It's a giant lobster shaped submarine that can go 900 feet deep under water and trundle overland too. In what way is that not awesome? In every sense, it is a great thing. Sure, it's not powerful in terms of game mechanics. But mechanics and fun aren't always the same thing.

[Zaq]

It's a giant lobster shaped submarine that can go 900 feet deep under water and trundle overland too. In what way is that not awesome? In every sense, it is a great thing. Sure, it's not powerful in terms of game mechanics. But mechanics and fun aren't always the same thing.

The limit on how many creatures can fit inside and the limit on how long they can breathe while inside really kills the fun for me. It's just not something that's fun for the whole party. Like I said, if it were big enough to actually put everyone inside it, I could see it being some silly fun, but we don't get to go on an underwater adventure in this thing unless we have a very small party (in one of several meanings).

[Skaven]

It can be pretty nice in low-level water-based campaigns.

[true_shinken]

It can be pretty nice in low-level water-based campaigns.

It costs 90k. How are you getting it at low level?

[MickJay]

You can find one abandoned by a frustrated, high-level party who just spent almost 100k on something that was next to useless for them

[gorfnab]

You could tweek them out and use them for Robot Wars style arena battles.

[big teej]

I threw one in an 'entry' dungeon just for kicks... I really like the fluff, regardless of how useful it is.

a beer keg.... that transforms into a lobster.... what is not to love?!

so yes, my players are going to have so much fun trying to figure out what the hell that thing is.

I'm also really kicking around the idea of having it come alive and chase them through the dungeon...

[The Big Dice]

a beer keg.... that transforms into a lobster.... what is not to love?!

so yes, my players are going to have so much fun trying to figure out what the hell that thing is.

I'm also really kicking around the idea of having it come alive and chase them through the dungeon...

See now that is exactly what i was saying earlier

Also, you're right about the figuring out thing, and it coming alive tochase them issomething that could be comedy gold.

Especially if there's a couple of PCs inside randomly puling levers while it runs after the rest randomly waving it's claws and stuff.

[BladeofOblivion]

Take Leadership and have two level 1 followers pilot it. They are doing more damage than they would otherwise.

[Prime32]

Take Leadership and have two level 1 followers pilot it. They are doing more damage than they would otherwise.

Couldn't you just buy them two 45,000gp rods of <blasting spell> or something?

[Urpriest]

Couldn't you just buy them two 45,000gp rods of <blasting spell> or something?

But how will they use them from inside the Apparatus of Kwalish?

[kestrel404]

OK, so this discussion ate my brain this afternoon and I've spent the time since coming up with this.

[The Vorpal Tribble]

Stick a Bottle of Air inside and you're set. The above is one of the most useful cheap items ever.

[Bryn]

The standard price is definitely much too high. What sort of price do you think would be right for the Apparatus?

[Doomboy911]

If they tripled the movement speed and let a party of five fit the price would be worth it. Maybe have the movement speed in water be faster and the further onto land the speed would decrease, 35 for marshy or low water lands, 30 for the beach, 20 for on ground and 10 for desert. That seems really fair.

[Lhurgyof]

Well, it's a technological item in a low-technology world. It's groundbreaking by D&D standards. xD

[Shpadoinkle]

The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy describes the Aparatus of Qualish as 'the most advanced magical self-contained trashcan in Dungeons and Dragons', and it is without a doubt at least 10 years ahead of its closest competitor.

The Guide lists the third most advanced magical self-contained trashcan to be Daern's Instant Fortress: a small metal cube which expands into a 20 foot square, 30 foot tall Adamantine tower complete with arrow slits and crenelations. Since the tower is immune to any form of physical or magical repair short of a wish spell (which are listed in the description as healing roughly half of the tower's HP), at 55000 gold it would be far too expensive a bastion to use, but because it expands instantly from a tiny cube into a 20 foot square Rook, its most common use is to crush unwelcome foes out of the way (after which you collapse the fortress to be used again).

The second most advanced self-contained trashcan (magical or otherwise) is a standard suit of Half-Plate armor. Unlike Full-Plate, which is a series of rigid metal plates, with the joints protected by much smaller plates linked together with chainmail, all constructed with care such that the plates rest upon one another, dissipating a good portion of their weight through the legs and feet and into the ground, Half-Plate cuts the assembly costs significantly by prioritizing the most vital or prominent areas of the body, with the plates mostly just strapped together. The advantage to this, appart from a 60% costs savings over full-plate, is that it provides nearly the same degree of protection, while restricting your mobility to the point that you no longer feel obligated to even try dodging attacks. In fact one Gnomish iventor simplified the production even further by simply building a metal cylinder with eye- and arm-holes (and an open bottom), which isn't really any more cumbersome than normal half-plate, and has the advantage that if fighting on higher ground, you can make a quick escape simply by falling over sideways and rolling away to freedom. Which all seemed well and good until in one particular battle, the inventor make a quick escape into a river and discovered that his 50lb steel barrel didn't float. Probably due to the eye-holes.

The Apparatus of Qualish, thus, takes both of these inventions to their natural (magical self-contained trashcan) conclusion. Though at first it appears to be nothing more than an overlarge sealed iron barrel, it is actually riddled with hidden ports from which emerge an array of lobster-like legs and feelers, and a tail. In fact, the Apparatus functions as something of a medieval amphibious submarine vehicle with a 2-man capacity, featuring such brilliant innovations as unlabelled and difficult to manipulate controls, an air supply determined by a random die roll, and pincer attacks which deal respectable damage. Or it would be respectable, perhaps, if not for 2 factors: 1) anyone skimming the Monstrous Manual might notice that all monsters that live underwater tend to be larger and far more dangerous than their land-based counterparts, probably to balance out the fact that players characters are always at a natural disadvantage in underwater combat, and 2) the Apparatus costs an Astounding 90,000 gold, which you would be 'out' if some giant squid crushed it. Compare this price to a Cloak of the Manta Ray (a 7200 gold item that grants you an array of excellent abilities in salt water, camouflages you as a native animal, moves three times as fast and does NOT have a limit on its airsupply), or a Headband of Intellect +6 (a 36000 gold item that would likely cause you to think better of this whole underwater affair).

In fact, for 90,000 gold, you could actually construct a Stone Golem, an unmanned automaton that fights much better than your 'lobster-barrel', obeys your commands, doesn't need to breathe at all, and can likely accomplish your sea-bed mission for you whilst you remain comfortably NOT-underwater.

From here.

In short: It's a terrible device and a huge waste of money.

[jmbrown]

The item is a carryover from AD&D where it's a pretty awesome item. Because of 3E's action economy, buffing of magic, and pricing of magic items it's terrible.

[Tehnar]

I gave a larger (and faster) version to my players. They used it as a base of operations for underwater adventures.

I just told them in advance that no one would want to buy that thing, so they shouldn't even bother trying.

[Prime32]

The siege crab is what the apparatus of Kwalish wishes it could be.


Basically, it needs to function more like an actual creature. 1 full-round action pulling levers lets it take a move+swift or standard action, with a maximum of two operators per round. Spells can be cast out from it by increasing their casting time by one stage. It includes a bottle of air.

[panaikhan]

I re-fluffed the AoK with a drow flavour, and called it the Apparatus of Lolth.
The pincers became a (magically) poisoned bite attack, it had a fluid launcher built into the 'tail', and had a spider-climb speed of 20.
It basically looked like two barrels joined together (one pilot, one 'gunner'), with biting jaws and 8 legs. I did do a 3D model of it. I'll attempt to post a pic at some point.

[Esser-Z]

I'm considering giving a modified one to a party of mine. Definitely not the straight SRD one, but with some upgrades...

[Zen Master]

I have dreamt up - but not yet used - a location/demi-plot/quest-thingy in a campaign, where the players happen upon the half-submerged and overgrown remains of an Apparatus of Kwalish in an area of mangrove swamps.

The AoK was used by an earlier group of adventurers who made it this far, but died when their camp was ambushed.

the AoK can be repaired (naturally) to provide the players with transportation into the sunken city of the BBE. Naturally, it will seat the full group, and provide air enough to get there.

For this branch of the plot, I'm toying with the idea of sacrificing my principles, and actually using a dragon. All in all however, that remains unlikely.

[big teej]

I stand by my transforming beer keg of awesome.

regardless of power level or practical use

[shadow_archmagi]

My DM ran a Kwalish-tournament once.

It basically consisted of rolling dice at random and shouting "CRAB BATTLE."

We were victorious and it was glorious.

[Tehnar]

This is the crab I gave to my players. They were level 10-11 at the time.

Spoiler

Show

Mechanical crab:

Huge construct
AC: 20 (+15 natural (reinforced steel plates), -3 size, -2 dex)
Touch AC: 5
HP: 150 (DR 15/adamantine); at 50% see leaks

Immunities and resistances:
Resist fire 30/-: Fire damage over 30 is dealt to creatures within the MC as well.
Immune to lightning: Creatures inside the crab take 100% of lightning damage a crab would take
Resist acid 20/-
Immune to cold

STR 35
DEX 6
CON -
INT -
WIS -
CHA -

BaB: +9
Grapple: +29


Movement modes:
It takes 1 person to drive the MC. While underwater it has two choices.
a) It can move at a speed of 100 ft, but it can't attack and its manuverability is treated as clumsy.
b) Speed 40 ft, can attack and manuverability is treated as good.

On land it moves slowly (15 ft) but can attack. On land it can't charge or run.
It is not known how deep can a MC go. It has been tested to up to 500 ft.


Attack modes:
It takes 1 person to man the MCs defensive modes. The following options are avaible to him:
a) A claw attack. Reach 10. +19 to hit, 2d6 + 12 damage. Standard action. Can be used in grapple.
b) A tail slap. Reach 15. +19 to hit. 3d6+18 damage. Full round action.
c) 2 claw attacks as above, but with bonuses +17/+17 . Full round action. Can be used in grapple.
d) Lightning surge. All creatures within 30 ft of the crab take 8d6 lightning damage (refl 18 half, creatures with metal weapons or armor take a -4 penalty to save). 1 round action. Can be used in grapple.
e) Escape a grapple. Make a grapple attemp with +29 bonus to leave the grapple (or to resist). Standard action or no action.


While in combat the MC is limited as any creature to actions it can take, however it requires at least 2 operators to both fight and move during the same round.

Saves: As a inanimate object it automatically fails all reflex saves. It is immune to all effects requiring will saves. It makes fort saves only against effects that would affect objects at a +16 bonus. It is considered to be a attended object for purposes of spells.

The MC resembles a huge lobster, and it takes a spot DC 25 to tell otherwise. The enterance to the aparatus is in the rear, near the tail. The enterance hatch does not need to be closed up to 100 ft in depth, as the air pressure keeps the water from coming in. At depths greater then those water begins pouring in. The MC provides its occupants a constant air supply enough for 6 medium sized persons. Aside from cramped space for 6 medium sized persons, there is enough storage for about 2000 lbs of gear. If the MC is loaded with more then 4000 lbs of gear and creatures it can not rise to the surface and will sink slowly. On its head there are two large dome shapped glass view ports that allow the driver and weapon controler view of their surroundings. There are also numerous viewports around and on the bottom of the MC. However visibility is still limited, the driver and the weapon operator take a -4 to their spot checks, while the rest of the passengers take a -10 penalty. The interior can be lit with a dim red light that is almost undetectable from outside, or be brightly lit.

The MC also has a modifiable outside lamp, that can shed bright illumination up to 60 ft.


Leaks: If the MC takes 75 damage, it develops leaks. Water keeps coming in and floods the interior in 4 hours rendering the MC inoperable.
If the MC takes 120 damage, its speed is reduced by 50%, and fills up with water in 2 hours.
If the MC is destroyed, the creatures inside take 6d6 damage and are ejected in random places outside the MC.

A destroyed MC cannot be repaired, while a damaged one can, with spells, or a DC 20 blacksmithing check each day repairs 1d8+1 points of damage.