[3.5] Watermelon vampire by RAW

[SkirtSteak]

I'm suddenly struck with the urge to make a vampire watermelon, but for some reason the vampire template can only be applied to humanoids and monstrous humanoids, not to inanimate objects. Sure, I could try to get a houseruled exception for watermelons, or just stat up a homebrew vampire watermelon creature, but I've already spent enough time trying to figure it out that I need some closure.

So here's the deal: I need to take inanimate plant matter and turn it into a humanoid, without losing its essential watermelonness. Getting the watermelon to take class levels and obscure prestige classes is acceptable, as is slapping template on top of template.

I think my best bet is to make a watermelon into a bogun, and try to find some class progression that allows constructs to become humanoid. Another possibility is to use Polymorph Any Object to turn it into a form with a duration modifier of 7 or 8, such as a myconid, and repeat until you turn it into a humanoid so you can vampirize it, then let it revert back into a watermelon and keep the vampire template. Finally a longer shot, I could say the setting has watermelon trees (which don't need to be statted and thus are just flavor) and then have a druid Awaken a watermelon tree, but then we run into the problem where the tree is intelligent, not the watermelons.

Any thoughts?

[NelKor]

I think you can turn a construct into a humanoid via a template in Savage Species.

[Urpriest]

If you Incarnate a bogun that could help start the process.

Though really the optimal way to do this involves a Psion Vampire and the Psionic Sandwich trick with a watermelon. But I don't think such a character would actually be able to drink blood as a watermelon.

[Fishy]

Technically, Half-Fey and Half-Dragon can be added to any corporeal creature, although the mechanics of breeding with a watermelon are left to the imagination.

There are a bunch of undead types that can be layered on top of that, but I don't think that Vampire is one of them.

You can, however, add Half-Troll and then Lycanthropy, to make the savage weretermelon.

[erikun]

I don't see any problem with simply applying Awaken to an individual watermelon, and then applying a vampire template. An Awakened tree (or other plant) would have stats identical to an animated object of the same size, and we already have stats for tiny-small animated objects. I'm not sure how that would be much different than claiming that watermelons grow on trees (they grow on vines, for the curious).

If that won't work, then simply research an Awaken Plant spell - or perhaps technically Awaken Fruit spell - to cast on your watermelon. Then Polymorph Any Object the watermelon into a humanoid, get them turned into a vampire, and turn them back into a watermelon. (Persisting the Polymorph may work to extend the duration to one day, allowing the vampirism to take hold... although I'm not 100% sure that Persist Spell can be applied this way.)

Of course, you run into the problem of how/why the vampire template still applies to an animated fruit... but that question will come up regardless of what you do.

[JeminiZero]

Here's my 2 cents:
1) Take a Watermelon. You need the vine to be still attached, and the overall melon+vine should have the shape of a stick figure (with the melon as its head)
2) Cast Permanancied Animate Object on the Melon. It is now a Construct.
3) Cast Incarnate Construct (SS) on your Melon Golem. It is now a Humanoid. Notably Incarnate Construct only works if the target construct has "roughly humanoid shape", which is why you needed stick figure vines.
4) Apply Vampirism.

[hamishspence]

Half-dragon template gives creature the dragon type.

Vampiric dragon template in Draconomicon can be added to creatures of the dragon type.

Theres also a Monstrous Vampire template in Ghostwalk- but I'm not sure if it can be added to plants.

So- half dragon added to any Plant Creature, opens up Vampiric Dragon.

[BobVosh]

Hmm. What are the requirements on halfgolem? I really am imagining a Half-golem awakened incarnate construct vampiric watermelon.

[hamishspence]

Awaken can be applied to "any tree" which with a bit of generous interpretation, might include a watermelon vine.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/awaken.htm

However- while the stats are those of an animated object- it has the plant type, not the construct type.

[Eldan]

Right. Wasn't there a "Vampiric" template that could be applied to non-humanoids? That could work. Let me check crystalkeep.

Edit: nope, that's just Vampiric Dragon.
Edit: Savage vampire can be applied to fey. Half-fey can be applied to any corporeal creature.

The next problem is that I'm pretty sure that non-awakened plants don't count as creatures. So we'd have to get a watermelon that fits the definition of tree.


Another, slightly strange approach: use the Topiary Guardian template to prune a melon into the shape of an animal, then make it a half-fey savage vampire. Bonus points if the animal is round and has no legs. A leech, perhaps.

[Morph Bark]

Here's my 2 cents:
1) Take a Watermelon. You need the vine to be still attached, and the overall melon+vine should have the shape of a stick figure (with the melon as its head)
2) Cast Permanancied Animate Object on the Melon. It is now a Construct.
3) Cast Incarnate Construct (SS) on your Melon Golem. It is now a Humanoid. Notably Incarnate Construct only works if the target construct has "roughly humanoid shape", which is why you needed stick figure vines.
4) Apply Vampirism.

While this is closest to what might be possible in this thread so far, I don't think Animate Object works on a living thing, even if it is not a creature. Unless the plant would be dead, but then it might instead fall under necromancing it into undead.

[Eldan]

Checked my way again. It seems to work:

1) Take an animal. If possible, close in shape and size to a watermelon. Perhaps one of these bottle-kitties.
2) Apply Topiary guardian template. It is now a plant creature. Make it from watermelons.
3) Apply half-fey. It is now a fey.
4) Apply savage vampire. It's now a vampire.

[hamishspence]

If I remember rightly, all half-fey have wings.

Whereas only Large half-dragons have wings under normal circumstances.

So a Medium watermelon vine going via Half-dragon & Vampiric Dragon, rather than half-fey & Savage Vampire, would have the advantage of being more like the standard plant in one respect- because it doesn't have wings.

[Eldan]

It would, however, get two claws and a bite. And a breath weapon.

[hamishspence]

True. Maybe the bite is from the watermelon head, which opens up just like The Plant from the colour Little Shop of Horrors movie- to reveal long fangs.

Which can be used to suck blood, as well as bite, once it gains the vampire template.

The claws can be the ends of sharp plant strands.

[JeminiZero]

While this is closest to what might be possible in this thread so far, I don't think Animate Object works on a living thing, even if it is not a creature. Unless the plant would be dead, but then it might instead fall under necromancing it into undead.

SRD states quite clearly that regular plants, such as one finds growing in gardens and fields, lack Wisdom and Charisma scores (see Nonabilities, above) and are not creatures, but objects, even though they are alive.

[hamishspence]

Also- if breath weapon is a problem, pick a dragon that doesn't have one.

Fang Dragon (also in Draconomicon) springs to mind.

Animate Objects and Animate Plants are two separate spells:

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/animateObjects.htm
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/animatePlants.htm

which may mean that you can't animate plants with Animate Objects.

[Eldan]

However, it doesn't specify that it can't be a plant. Or even a non-living object. Not a creature, mind you, but theoretically, it's possible to have objects that are alive, but not creatures. Weird, I know.

Now, of course, the question becomes whether or not plants are inanimate.

[hamishspence]

Some can move parts of them (carnivorous plants like the sundew, and the Venus flytrap, spring to mind.)

There's also a plant that can close its leaves very fast in response to being touched (but not to catch prey).

And there is closing flowers at night, and opening them in the morning.

These might make them "animate objects".

[Eldan]

Actually, pretty much all plants move, after a fashion. A lot of them can turn towards the light, and they at least grow in specific directions according to gravity and light.

Also, our botany professor showed us a very interesting video once of seeds able to crawl across the ground and bury themselves, via little hairs that acted a little like caterpillar legs. Only much, much slower.

[hamishspence]

Which might go with

"normal objects are inanimate, so the spell works, but plants are animate, so a different spell must be used."

Does the idea of something that looks like a normal watermelon- until the "fruit" splits open to reveal a mouth full of teeth, seem like an interesting one?

[Eldan]

Sure. It's not what the watermelon vampire in the original article is, but still pretty cool.

I still think that it's wings could be fluffed as leaves, but a draconic form is also pretty cool.

[JeminiZero]

Note that the text provided for Animate Plants specifies that:"You imbue inanimate plants with mobility and a semblance of life."

Ergo, if all plants were considered Animate, then the spell would not work on any plants, and would entirely defeat the purpose of the spell. It is more likely that D&D considers normal plants to be inanimate, despite whatever movements they are capable of over long period of time.

And since normal plants are also objects, they therefore also qualify as inanimate objects.

[Eldan]

Yeah. Whatever speed plants have is still far below five feet per six seconds, so would probably count as 0.

[hamishspence]

I still think that it's wings could be fluffed as leaves, but a draconic form is also pretty cool.

That could be done, for an extra-large one.

The typically butterfly-like wings of half-fey could also be refluffed as leaves.

The tricky part is choosing to define a vine as a tree (though the strangler fig is a vine that finishes up pretty tree-ish).

I figure that might be simpler than going via Topiary Guardian though- and retains the basic shape of the plant.

[Runestar]

I now have this mental image of a watermelon splitting open to reveal arms and jaws, similar to those bakugan toys.

[hamishspence]

I was thinking just the fruit splitting open to reveal jaws, and strands leading off the main stem curling inward to become claws.

But Transformer Watermelon could work too.

[Aotrs Commander]

Hell, you could reflavour half-dragon's fire breath weapon to be Solarbeam... I mean, you're already half Sunkern, so why not...?

[Thrawn183]

I'm pretty sure that as far as plants go, they're considered objects unless they are plant type monsters. You know, the ones that have slam attacks and the like.

[hamishspence]

Generally, yes- the question is, should Animate Objects work on them when there already is an Animate Plants spell?

There's a way to go from object (plant) to Plant Creature (the awaken spell, if you can count the plant as a tree) and from there, other templates can be used to open up access to one of the vampire templates.

But should Animate Objects take it straight from object (plant) to Construct, or should the spell not work?