Traveling in Style[3.5]

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In a gestalt campaign(level 7, currently) I'm playing in, I've recieved advance notification that my character will soon die(don't ask, it's a long story). At the same time, I was also notified that the campaign was now focused on breaking our characters as much as is possible. So I set about making the most broken character(s) ever to be seen.

I ended up with a Diplomancer Thrallherd(random classes//psion/thrallherd), accompanied by an optimized Basketweaver Thrallherd Thrall Priest(more random classes//archivist). My build is based around these two being carried around by their followers while randomly making remarks about the party and only occasionally helping by using game-breaking hacked skills to change the course of the plot. I regret nothing.

Now, enough introduction. Here's what this thread is about:
I simply can't figure out how to make this work. I don't know of any rules for litters or such, especially not big enough for both of them, their baskets, and a bard. Second, they need a way to rest comfortably at night. And not just comfortably. The campsite must be preferable to an expensive hotel room with free room service.

So, basically, I require two things:
1) The ability to travel with the greatest of ease
2) A very restful and/or ostentatious campsite that can be quickly assembled

Resources available include:
Eight level 1 thralls
Perhaps 4000 GP
Nearly unlimited baskets
Massive diplomacy and bluff checks

I know this is completely ridiculous, but could I have some help?
All I can think of is wands of [insert spell name here]...

[woodenbandman]

leomund's X

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leomund's X

Thanks, are there any besides Secure Shelter and Tiny Hut?
And do you know if I can get it as a wand?

[Foryn Gilnith]

Tiny Igloo is a second-level Leomund's spell from Frostburn. Get a Drow House Insignia (Drow of the Underdark), convince your DM that the list of "typical" spells isn't exclusive, and stick Tiny Igloo in there. 10 hours per day of spherical packed snow for your poor little thralls to carry.

[JeminiZero]

I don't know of any rules for litters or such, especially not big enough for both of them, their baskets, and a bard.

Use these as guidelines.

Also, if your Archivist is sufficiently high level to cast Animate Dead, you could get your cart/wagon/carriage pulled around by skeleton horses instead of thralls.

[Gabe the Bard]

Does the build have to be purely by the books? Is there any way you can get Magnificent Mansion, or maybe a custom spell, like "X's Glorious Campsite", as a spell-like ability? Maybe it could have an expensive material component or a similar trade off.