How do I steal someones items. Quickly and efficiently (3.5)

[Elfstone]

Once again, I petition you all for help. Since the game Im asking for help iin is a PvP game I wont say to much about the setting. Or the event for that matter.
All I need to know is what are the best methods for removing someones stuff. With out fighting them for it, and as quickly as possible. Any spells, items, abilities. (Yes I know pickpocketing skill, but I dont have ranks in it even though its a class skill)

Thanks in advance you guys.

[Glimbur]

Sleight of Hand is incredibly good. If you can reliably pull off a DC 40 skill check, you can as a free action steal both of their rings and their amulet. Possibly also more things, if you can talk your DM into allowing you to take a belt or bracers or goggles or a hat. Armor is right out. Weapons are trickier.

If you pin a person you can use Disarm to remove a well secured object, which is another method for stealing belts, bracers, etc but it is not quick or easy.

The Disarm action is mediocre unless you have a source of extra actions so you can pick up and pocket the disarmed items.

Listen happens at a -10 if you are asleep.

Entice Gift is a fun spell from Spell Compendium which makes someone give you what they are holding.

If you can get a pet rust monster (I don't know a cost, sorry) you can... remove their metal equipment. A gauntlet of rusting grasp can achieve a similar goal in more limited fashion.

The quickest way I can think of to remove someone's stuff is to kill them in a round and then loot the body. This can be nontrivial.

[FMArthur]

My method involves bringing a pencil and eraser, then ordering pizza during the session.

[Barbin]

My method involves bringing a pencil and eraser, then ordering pizza during the session.

Smart move, bub.

[HunterOfJello]

Sleight of Hand.

Disarm while Unarmed.

Sunder (if you just want to destroy it)

Spells that make the enemy helpless like a spell with Stun.

Dimensional Reach [Reserve Feat] which allows you to teleport unattended items that you have line of sight to into your hand. The items have to be low-weight and it doesn't work very far though.

[Darrin]

Here's a build I put together to steal every unattended item in the entire world as a free action: The Lightning Thief.

There are a few ideas in there on optimizing Sleight of Hand.

[gorfnab]

The Kender Handler prestige class from Dragonlance: Races of Ansalon, page 156, might be worth looking into.

[Jothki]

It's probably easiest to just have a caster throw an appropriate Save or Lose at them.

[Czin]

Rust Dragons; they make fighters cry.

[FelixG]

Wait till they are asleep, use a 1 charge item of Silence.

Then you can walk right into their tent, bang around grabbing all their stuff and they never get a listen check to wake up to the racket.

[J.Gellert]

Baleful Polymorph.

All items worn or carried by the subject fall to the ground at its feet, even if they could be worn or carried by the new form.

Though for your purposes it may constitute "fighting them for it"?

[Farlion]

All I need to know is what are the best methods for removing someones stuff. With out fighting them for it, and as quickly as possible. Any spells,

(Greater) Dispell magic + Chain shatter?

Its also some sort of "removing".

Cheers,
Farlion

[Coidzor]

It's 3.0 web content, but... You could make 'em think they're some other creature than what they are and thus just take the stuff because they don't realize they own it. Or think they're something without territorial instincts or fear of man. Like a dodo or something.

Medium range too, so one could obfuscate what one was doing a bit.

edit: Oh, and I believe there's a BoEF spell for quickly rendering a target naked. Is quite OP when used as a debuff against opponents too.

If you can get a pet rust monster (I don't know a cost, sorry) you can... remove their metal equipment. A gauntlet of rusting grasp can achieve a similar goal in more limited fashion.

Hmm, I believe the Arms and Equipment Guide has a cost listed for them in the Guard(ian?) Creatures section.

[Psyren]

My method involves bringing a pencil and eraser, then ordering pizza during the session.

This is win
I like the adaptation that lets you use Chinese instead

[true_shinken]

This is win
I like the adaptation that lets you use Chinese instead

Chinese is totally overpowered, I'd ban it in my table.

[Psyren]

Chinese is totally overpowered, I'd ban it in my table.

Some lines were meant to be crossed

[graeylin]

My method involves bringing a pencil and eraser, then ordering pizza during the session.

Oh great, more cheese at the gaming table.

[Sebastrd]

The cheesiest way I ever saw was loose interpretation of overchanneled energy missle - sonic version I believe.

[Psyren]

Oh great, more cheese at the gaming table.

*reads pun*
*slits own throat to stop laughter*

[Telonius]

High Bluff check/Glibness, and a method to cast Magic Aura on a bunch of items. (Works best if they don't have Identify at the moment).

"Hey friend, I noticed you're on a quest. I happen to be an adventurer myself, but I'm thinking of getting out of the game and retiring. Maybe open a nice inn. Trouble is, I have all my assets locked up in my equipment. You know how it is. I'm not willing to totally sell it off - never know when some young party is going to try to burn it down - but I'd like to downgrade. So tell you what. For 5000 gp, I'll trade you this +4 armor, my +2 Wounding greatsword, and a bunch of potions for your +3 armor, +2 Greatsword, and your scrolls. Deal?

[true_shinken]

High caster level and Phantasmal Thief would work as well.

[Keld Denar]

*reads pun*
*slits own throat to stop laughter*

Why so serious?

[mootoall]

Whipped Cream is useful for this. Fill two pie tins with it while sharing Greater Invisibility with your familiar. Cast True Strike, again sharing it. It's a ranged touch attack to obscure his vision, and then, if The Three Bards Stooges are any indication, it's a full round action to clear it. While your familiar sits them down in a barber's chair for a shave, remove their boots. You've just removed some of his equipment.

[nedz]

Disintegrate, yeah wizards

[Tyndmyr]

Mage hand and it's greater cousin. For larger thefts, Tenser's Floating Disk.

You can make off with a great deal of stuff without actually having to do it yourself, making denial much more plausible. See also, disguising spellcasting.

[Zeful]

Get a Battle Axe, wait until your target's asleep and then CdG them for a 40+ fort save, take stuff.

[Hanuman]

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/skills/sleightofhand.htm

If you try to take something from another creature, you must make a DC 20 Sleight of Hand check to obtain it. The opponent makes a Spot check to detect the attempt, opposed by the same Sleight of Hand check result you achieved when you tried to grab the item. An opponent who succeeds on this check notices the attempt, regardless of whether you got the item.

This is why lower level wizards can be fools-mated in PvP, if you can get up to them and make the DC20 you can snatch their component pouch, and it's why most people put their holy symbols on things they actually hold.

[ArcanistSupreme]

Disjunction works if you're feeling mean and don't care about the treasure.

[Elfstone]

I do care about treasure, I have already picked my race (in the middle of a game here =), the time when I will be taking stuff will be chaotic, and it looks as if Slight of hand is my best bet. Its trained but all I have is +8 from dex..... Any items that boost slight of hand?

And Coidzor, that sounds great, except this is a drow campaign.... It may work. Ill look into it, thanks.

[nedz]

Theres a 2nd level spell in the SpC called Entice Gift. Basically if they fail their save, then they give you whatever there holding. It costs them an action and you get their weapon/wand/staff/whatever.