Magic Missile Pun

[Hitaro9]

Hey. I need a joke/ pun that has to do with magic missile. Preferably short. Thanks in advance.

[ScubaGoomba]

Here's a bad one

MAGIC NEVER-MISS-ILE

[Talvereaux]

I'm taking a shot at the darkness here and assuming the context of cheesy one-liners for casting, correct me if I'm wrong.

"Hate to force you aside, but..."

"This is going to spell disaster for you."

"Why don't you lie back a spell?"

"Try damning these torpedoes."

Though the last one's a bit arcane, if you will.

[Hitaro9]

Yeah, I need it for witty one liners after killing someone with Magic Missile. I plan on playing a magic missile focused mage that thinks he's funnyer than he actually is.

[Talvereaux]

Good luck. Hit 'em right between the eyes for 1d4+1 points of farce damage.

[darkbuu_1]

Here's a bad one

MAGIC NEVER-MISS-ILE

I prefer "Magic Hit-ile"

[Kurgan]

This is more for during casting, but I had a friend who used to chant "Eenie meenie minie moe, magic missile strike my foe!" every time he cast Magic Missile.

[Morph Bark]

Have the character mumble a lot about how Evil is "the Darkness". Then, in combat, shout "Attack the Darkness!"

Not a pun, but still up the alley you might want to go.

Otherwise, try "Hit-or-miss? I just hit with missiles."

[navar100]

Play a female wizard. "You need not know my name, fool, but if you need to know who defeated you with such simple magic, you can call me Miss Ayle."

[AsDeR]

"Sorry I was sneezing, did I miss?"
"I wonder how can my hands hold this much awesome"

Also after killing:
"I will never FORCE-get you" yeeeeeaaaaaah
"I'll missILE you." yeeeeeaaaaaah
"Did I missILE'D anything?" yeeeeeaaaaaah
"Pleased to missile you" yeeeeeaaaaaah

[Ravens_cry]

"Did you Magic Missile?"
"No, and you can't prove I enchanted her either!"

[Socratov]

combine: *thrusts hip*

with:

and there is more where that came from
yes, my missile is magic, why do you ask?
Sometimes, i focus all my magic in my missile
you kow what else deals force damage?
you know what happens when my magic missile gets maximised

[Dire_E_Coyote]

"May the force damage be with you."

[Slipperychicken]

"I don't miss". The more dialogue leading up to this, the better.

[Siosilvar]

I'm taking a shot at the darkness here...

I see what you did there.

[TechnoScrabble]

I know what you're thinking "Did he cast 3 1st level spells or only 2?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I kinda lost track myself. But being I'm a wizard, the most powerful class in the world, and know spells that blow your head right off, you've got to ask yourself one question "Do I have good spell resistance?" Well, do ya, punk?

[McMouse]

Magic missile: 60% of the time, it hits every time.

[CGforever!]

"BANG, you're dead!"

the enemy then naturally says, "Nuh uh! You missed me!"

Then gets hit, because hey, magic missile.

[CGforever!]

Magic missile: 60% of the time, it hits every time.

Against 4th level swiftblades, it actually does hit 60% of the time.

[Douglas]

Against 4th level swiftblades, it actually does hit 60% of the time.

You mean 7th level. Blurred Alacrity does nothing against Magic Missile, you need Evasive Celerity for that.

[navar100]

Cast Magic Missile. Next round, cast a more powerful, more potent spell. Before you do say: "I'm not really left handed".

[CGforever!]

You mean 7th level. Blurred Alacrity does nothing against Magic Missile, you need Evasive Celerity for that.

Right. I wasn't sure. Anyway, Whenever the miss chance is only 40%.

[Jarawara]

Heh. I approve of this thread.

*~*

Magic Missile. The Other Force Evocation.

(Meant to be read like "Pork, the other white meat"... which may only be a local-only TV commercial, so this line might not work for you.)

[Acanous]

"The rest of the guys want me to Defeat you, but I preffer to use D4's."
""Bet you wish you had a Shield right now"
"What's more holey than Pelor? You in about 6 seconds."
"This just KEEPS getting FUNNIER EVERY TIME I cast it!"

[Hbgplayer]

Don't worry, I won't miss you.

[nedz]

Give up ! Or I'll cast a real spell next time.

[Sebastrd]

You can't spell missle without "miss"!

[Magesmiley]

Name the wizard casting the spell 'Ack-Ack' or 'Gatling'.

[randomhero00]

"Look at me.
Now look at you,
I just magic missiled.
Now I'm riding a horse."

"I'll magic your missile!"

"Have change for a dollar for some MISSILES OF MAGIC!?"

"Milk milk lemonade, round the corner MISSILES are made!"

"There once lived a man in Nantucket... that's it, I killed him with magic missile!"

[lotusblossom13]

This is based on an old one, but

"I came here to chew gum and shoot magic missiles, and I'm all out of gum"