Detect, Seduce, Destroy, Combine [Spells]

[CaelCyndar1993]

Detect Gender
Divination
Level: Sor/Wiz 0, Brd 1
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 Standard Action
Range: Close (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels)
Target: Any creature within the range that possesses a gender
Duration: Concentration, up to 1 min/level
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No
The mysteries of gender are revealed to you as you focus your magical energies. Any creature that possesses a gender (Undead and Constructs that once possessed or are intended to possess a gender do not count) that are within the spell's range will begin to reveal (No, not that way you sick perverts) their gender to you according to the time concentrating.

Round 1: Detect the presence of gendered creatures

Round 2: Detect how many of creatures of each gender there are

Round 3: Creatures within the detection range will begin to glow a color according to their gender in the caster's eyes: Light blue for males and pink for females.

Seduce
Enchantment
Level: Bar 3 Sor/Wiz 4 Dru 4
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 Full-Round Action
Range: Personal
Target: Any living creature of the same type of the caster that looks at the caster
Duration: 1 minute/level
Saving Throw: Will negates (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No
Your image becomes more heavenly than the gods themselves as you weave a tapestry of magic around you. 2d4+half caster level HD targets of the same type of you that sees you becomes entranced by your fake beauty. Any target affected by this spell must make a will save (DC 12 + Caster level) or be seducted by your illusion. (Creatures of the same gender gain a +7 circumstance bonus on their save.) Seducted creatures act goofy around you, giggling, complimenting you, and even asking you out. Nothing can force the creature to attack you, and anyone attacking or insulting you will be attacked by the creature in turn.

Material Component: A white rose

Squeeze
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 6
Components: V, S, M
Casting Time: 1 Full-Round Action
Range: Long (400 ft. + 40 ft./level)
Target: One living creature
Duration: Concentration (Up to 1 round/2 levels)
Saving Throw: Fortitude Halves or Negates (See below)
Spell Resistance: No

By squeezing an organ in your hand, you inflict great damage upon the same organ in an opponent's body. For every round squeezing the organ, your target takes 1d10 + 1/level (Max 10) damage due to the strain on the organ. A successful Fortitude save halves the damage. Popping the organ in your hand immediately ends the spell's effect, with no extra damage to the opponent. Depending on the organ squeezed, other side effects may occur at the spells end:

Heart: 1 Con damage
Lungs: Unable to breath easily (Instantly drowning in water or suffocating in a vaccum. Taking 1d10 subdual damage whenever you run.)
Brain: 2 Int damage
Stomach: Nauseated or Sickened for 1d8 rounds
Male Reproductive Organs: Infertility, actions reduced to 1 move action per round for 2 minutes.
Female Reproductive Organs: Infertility

All secondary effects may be negated with a successful fortitude save.

Material Component: The organ of which you squeeze. (Must have been extracted from body less than three days ago.)

Fuse Creature
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 9
Components: V, S, XP
Casting Time: 1 hour
Range: Personal
Target: Two touched creatures
Duration: Permanent
Saving Throw: Will Negates (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No
By touching two creatures, your powerful arcane might may fuse them together forever. When fused, both creatures are combined into a more powerful being. All outer traits (Type, race, size, speed, etc.) are the same as the creature with greater HD. Skill ranks, Ability scores, and levels are combined. (Multiclass penalties apply as normal.) Items owned by the two creatures appear in front of them after the casting. In the case of arcane spellcasters, the spell list is reset and refilled with spells according to the number of spells known by the combined caster level. A clone spell will effectively seperate the creatures.

XP: 5000 + 1000 per HD of creatures fused

Greater Squeeze
Level: Sor/Wiz 9
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Fortitude Halves
Spell Resistance: No
As Squeeze except once cast, the target creature must immediately make a Fortitude save or have his insides completely crushed, leaving nothing but skin filled with a mixture of nearly-obliterated tissue, blood, water, and fat. The creature is immediately slain. Even if the creature succeeds on its Fortitude Save, it is dealt 12d8 damage, as well as suffering the effects of all organs being squeezed.

[Baron_Dex]

Hey, are you discriminating here? Why does it have to be only the opposite gender?

The spells are amusing if nothing else. Charm person (make someone think of you as their friend) could go a long way to seducing someone, or at least help.

And I believe it should be called "Seduce," seduct is not a word.

[CaelCyndar1993]

Well, I'm assuming that there really aren't homosexuals in a world where there are hardly any luxuries. No offense to any of those out there.

Oh, and yes. The spells are meant to be amusing.

[Mewtarthio]

Detect Gender could avoid some awkward moments, but it should really be a cantrip, since there's little in the way of actual mechanical benefit unless you're trying to pose as a Gibbering Mouther husbandry specialist ("Okay, who here wants to find out where people get the 'Aberrant Blood' feat?"). Also, technically people don't glow under detection spells. You simply know what they are by their "aura."

Seduce is okay, but it'd be simpler to just have a Charm-type effect. Also, DnD isn't medieval society.

[magic8BALL]

No luxuries?

I'll pull up on my +5 comfy chair and think about that. Unseen servent! Another potion of happy thoughts...

[CaelCyndar1993]

Well, they're also people who've seen hell (literally) and lived to tell about it. Comparing Luxuries VS Adventuring... Adventuring has a higher impact.

And since when do chairs have stat bonuses?

[Glooble Glistencrist]

Why same race? A human could easily be attracted to an elf. Where do you think half-elfs come from?

[Athenodorus]

If I were a wizard, one of the first things I'd enchant would be a nice comfy chair. Right after the stein to keep my beer cold.

[CaelCyndar1993]

Changed race to type. Okay, I get it. There are some luxuries. Any other spells I should do?

[Cybren]

Why same race? A human could easily be attracted to an elf. Where do you think half-elfs come from?

beer.
beer beer beer.

[ampcptlogic]

If we're being goofy, why not do a Know Fantasies spell? I.E, something that will reveal the romantic, personal/professional, or, um, private fantasies of the target.

Make it a v,s,m spell and change the component for the particular kind of fantasy you want to divine. Something like a rose for the romantic, maybe a coin for the personal, and something more intimate for the private.

[Grey Knight]

"Okay, who here wants to find out where people get the 'Aberrant Blood' feat?"

Definitely not me!

[CaelCyndar1993]

Added a new spell: Squeeze

[Emperor Tippy]

Hmm. I could have fun with the BBEG and a certain male reproductive organ.

[CaelCyndar1993]

Nice. I added reproductive organs in.

[Neek]

Detect gender should be 0 for S/W, but 1 for Bard. (Come on, you'd think that dashing fellow ought to know? :D)

I've only one problem with Seduce. The Target. Not to get into any sexuality-debate, but I'd say that seducing someone of the same gender shouldn't be withheld by this spell; just that there should be a modifier for opposing sexualties on the Will save.

You describe the Seduce spell like it could affect more than one target. I'd rephrase it just to make sure. And make a higher-level Entrance (or Fangirl/Fanboy) spell does the same to 2d4+half caster level HD targets of the same type.

[CaelCyndar1993]

Thanks for the CC. I edited it around a little like you said.

[SilveryCord]

Well, I'm assuming that there really aren't homosexuals in a world where there are hardly any luxuries. No offense to any of those out there.

Oh, and yes. The spells are meant to be amusing.

Actually, homosexuality is not nearly a recent thing. There was plenty of homosexuality in medieval times.

In fact, in ancient greece, there was once a war band comprised entirely of homosexual couples.

Greece had a lot better living conditions/standard of life than other countries, however, so their population 'allowed for' homosexuality. (The main force of the anti-homosexuality passages written in the bible? Common sense. When the death rate is over 60%, you can't afford 2 people not popping out babies. Especially in the many small towns around jerusalem/middle east in various deserts and such)
After the greeks faded away, the 'left over' attitude of homosexuality being a sin dominated europe (and even the americas) even after the population issues were no longer a problem.

And, sorry, but not all of us are women in men's bodies ;)

[CaelCyndar1993]

Once again, thanks for the CC, I completely forgot about that.

New spell: Fuse Creature (Inspired by Simacralum, which made me think: What if I fused two Simacrala? Would I get the original creature?

[sigurd]

Detect gender should allow a saving throw, or require a DC. Anything to allow the one being 'probed' to feel a little invaded. I can't imagine it is a very polite action to count and categorize the various private parts in a room.


S

[CaelCyndar1993]

New spell: Greater Squeeze.

[Dhavaer]

Shouldn't Detect Gender be Detect Sex? I'm assuming it reads biological, not social, indicators.

[Mewtarthio]

Detect gender should allow a saving throw, or require a DC. Anything to allow the one being 'probed' to feel a little invaded. I can't imagine it is a very polite action to count and categorize the various private parts in a room.


S

The alignment detection spells don't allow saving throws, and I'd think that the very nature of your soul is far more private than your sex. Detect Evil lets a paladin smite you to death, while Detect Gender only lets a crazy old wizard remember what a woman looks like after he's been at his books too long. Oh, and it prevents you from cross-dressing effectively around mages.

Shouldn't Detect Gender be Detect Sex? I'm assuming it reads biological, not social, indicators.

Technically, yes, but Detect Sex sounds like something that should be on the Chaperone spell list (right up there with Modify Music and Transmute Alcohol to Water).

[Callos_DeTerran]

Definitely not me!

Oh come on, its not that painful!

[XtheYeti]

Oh come on, its not that painful!

Says the person who doesnt have abolith blood

[Neek]

Fuse Creature
Transmutation
Level: Sor/Wiz 9
Components: V, S, XP
Casting Time: 1 hour
Range: Personal
Target: Two touched creatures
Duration: Permanent
Saving Throw: Will Negates (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No
By touching two creatures, your powerful arcane might may fuse them together forever. When fused, both creatures are combined into a more powerful being. All outer traits (Type, race, size, speed, etc.) are the same as the creature with greater HD. Skill ranks, Ability scores, and levels are combined. (Multiclass penalties apply as normal.) Items owned by the two creatures appear in front of them after the casting. In the case of arcane spellcasters, the spell list is reset and refilled with spells according to the number of spells known by the combined caster level. A clone spell will effectively seperate the creatures.

XP: 5000 + 1000 per HD of creatures fused

I am reminded of Bram Stroker's Dracula. I hope you are too. :D This is a nifty little spell... you say, however, that the creature's effective Type, Race, whatnot is the same as the creature with a greater hit die, that's cool... but what if it's two humans? Is the new combination a large creature? How does that work for two targets whose only HD is levels?

[CaelCyndar1993]

A class level is basically a HD. As for fusing two humans: You would get whatever human had more HD. If the HD was equal, then the DM would decide.

[Callos_DeTerran]

Says the person who doesnt have abolith blood

*hides a tentacle* Of course. Your perfectly correct in that statement.