GMing advice needed

[beachhead1973]

I am looking at the approaching game night with dread;

basically this is becoming a chore: I just have no interest in running the sorts of games these guys are interested in and frankly it seems more like they would rather play board games.

I have resources in my area, but without giving away too much detail, I have trouble taking advantage of them due to my schedule. I would love to either find a new group interested in the kinds of games I want to run, or perhaps better, one where I do not have to GM all the time, but I am not having any luck.



Thanks for your time

[Arbane]

There's nothing wrong with playing board games while you look for different players.

[Lorsa]

Finding the right people to play with is a neverending quest in the hobby for sure. Unfortunately without knowing where you live it's impossible for any of us to provide any decent help in the matter.

Also, what sort of games/playstyles ARE you interested in?

[AKA_Bait]

There's nothing wrong with playing board games while you look for different players.

Agreed. Everyone, including you, is supposed to be having fun. If it's a chore and you don't want to do it anymore, stop. If you really feel you need to be politic about that, find a way to wrap up whatever campaign you have the party on in one or two more sessions.

In terms of finding a new group, I have had some success locating groups through the websites of local gaming stores. Many have a message board component that will allow players seeking games to post what they are looking for.

[Segev]

Are none of your players willing to DM?

[SethoMarkus]

I would suggest speaking with the players and communicating your expectations with the style of game that you want to play. Ask them, in their own words, what kind of game they want to play. If those play styles can't be reconciled, and if compromise isn't an option, then either find a different activity together while you look for a new group.

If there is a game shop in the area, that is usually a good place to find like-minded hobbyists. It may not be socially acceptable depending on where you live and what your age is, but college/university campuses also tend to have clubs or groups of people that are interested in table-top RPGs of some variety or other.

Lastly, don't discount playing games through web forums. Both here at the Playground as well as at other similar sites there is a veritably diverse and expansive community of gamers willing to play through forums, skype, chatrooms, etc. Don't give up! You may need to wait a while before it pays off, but I'm sure you'll find another gaming group more suitable to your style before too long.

[Trinoya]

The moment it becomes a chore, just stop. Don't continue, don't keep running, just stop. You're not doing anyone any favors, especially yourself.

That said, if you are in the Maryland area pop me a PM, I might be able to arrange a game for you.

[Raum]

I have resources in my area, but without giving away too much detail, I have trouble taking advantage of them due to my schedule. I would love to either find a new group interested in the kinds of games I want to run, or perhaps better, one where I do not have to GM all the time, but I am not having any luck.

Have you looked at online gaming? That's one of the easiest ways to deal with schedule problems...game with people in a timezone a bit closer to your schedule.

It does sound like you need some kind of a change...good luck!

[beachhead1973]

Well to the first point; after so long with these guys, I have a real hate on board games. It takes me forever to even figure out how to play and the rules confuse me and about half the time, it's a game we've never played before.

I love RPGs because of the freedom to do whatever you want, within very loose limits.

I live in SW Ontario.

I like decision-driven games first and foremost, where the calls the PCs make matters; I hate railroading and I try as much as possible to give my players as many avenues as possible, even when they don't even consider they might be there.

I like realism up to the point where it reduces the fun. not every NPC is helpful, many situations are not what they seem, the PCs get out and out lied to often. I like combat; RPGs are about letting off steam by killing the bad guys and being part of a cool story to me. I like real roleplaying; when I hear someone say; "Ugh! I know I should do this, but I think my character would do this." I know I am doing it right, especially if I can get someone really invested in their character.

I like equipment to matter. "Your sword" is not as good as "your sword; with which you have been through many battles and which allowed you to slay lord thunderbottom during the battle of crotchrot gorge." I come from a military background; so I am used to being able to identify my rifle by it's scratches, without reading the serial number, knowing which machinegun of my two jams more and I'm married to my rucksack. I like setting things up so that my players know that feeling. Gear in my games is more unique and harder to come by in most cases, this is a change from my initial forays where PCs were able to pickup weapons anywhere, anytime almost at leisure.

In the last game I ran, the PCs started with some gear that was falling apart, some of the guns were woefully short of ammo and some stuff was just junk. I didn't totally hobble them with it, but making my sniper count her shots and curse ever miss really added to the atmosphere i was trying to make.

There isn't a huge desire for my guys to GM games, one guy I know can do it, they'd rather if I don't do it, we do something else.

I don't like the online thing because, sad as it sounds, this is my main social event for the week.

[Blackrook]

You can do what I did. My group broke up after we all graduated college when I was 24. I had an a son when I was 30. Now he is 17, and his friends make a good gaming group for me to DM. So basically, I waited more than 20 years to have a good gaming group. I still use all the old figures from the previous group, and the playing mat.

[tasw]

Convince one of them to switch off weeks with you. Part time GM'ing can be much less stressful.

If none of them will do it I would suggest meetup.com or even Craigslist to find someone to GM. depending on your city the groups or activities section may help.

[The Kind Knido]

Same problem; I'd like to DM a game, however, everyone is scattered by literal miles and there's no way I'd be able to put together regular sessions especially when/if they won't show up to the game itself or Skype calls to discuss PCs so I can craft some adventures.

Looks like I set up a table in the other room and ordered some gaming supplements for absolutely nothing.

[Alejandro]

Well to the first point; after so long with these guys, I have a real hate on board games. It takes me forever to even figure out how to play and the rules confuse me and about half the time, it's a game we've never played before.

I love RPGs because of the freedom to do whatever you want, within very loose limits.

I live in SW Ontario.

I like decision-driven games first and foremost, where the calls the PCs make matters; I hate railroading and I try as much as possible to give my players as many avenues as possible, even when they don't even consider they might be there.

I like realism up to the point where it reduces the fun. not every NPC is helpful, many situations are not what they seem, the PCs get out and out lied to often. I like combat; RPGs are about letting off steam by killing the bad guys and being part of a cool story to me. I like real roleplaying; when I hear someone say; "Ugh! I know I should do this, but I think my character would do this." I know I am doing it right, especially if I can get someone really invested in their character.

I like equipment to matter. "Your sword" is not as good as "your sword; with which you have been through many battles and which allowed you to slay lord thunderbottom during the battle of crotchrot gorge." I come from a military background; so I am used to being able to identify my rifle by it's scratches, without reading the serial number, knowing which machinegun of my two jams more and I'm married to my rucksack. I like setting things up so that my players know that feeling. Gear in my games is more unique and harder to come by in most cases, this is a change from my initial forays where PCs were able to pickup weapons anywhere, anytime almost at leisure.

In the last game I ran, the PCs started with some gear that was falling apart, some of the guns were woefully short of ammo and some stuff was just junk. I didn't totally hobble them with it, but making my sniper count her shots and curse ever miss really added to the atmosphere i was trying to make.

There isn't a huge desire for my guys to GM games, one guy I know can do it, they'd rather if I don't do it, we do something else.

I don't like the online thing because, sad as it sounds, this is my main social event for the week.

Okay. Now, can you tell us what kind of game your players are interested in? You indicated there was a disconnect.

[molten_dragon]

I am looking at the approaching game night with dread;

basically this is becoming a chore: I just have no interest in running the sorts of games these guys are interested in and frankly it seems more like they would rather play board games.

I have resources in my area, but without giving away too much detail, I have trouble taking advantage of them due to my schedule. I would love to either find a new group interested in the kinds of games I want to run, or perhaps better, one where I do not have to GM all the time, but I am not having any luck.



Thanks for your time

Just tell your group that you're getting burnt out on DM'ing and you need a break. If no one else is willing to take over DM'ing, then just don't play for awhile.

I'm not sure what other resources you're using to try and find a new group, but if you haven't checked out pen and paper games yet, you should. It's basically a classified ad where people can look for game/players in their area.

[Bulhakov]

My suggestion - meet up with the group and do something other than RPGs. Watch a movie you can all make fun of but still enjoy, go out for a beer, have a small fighting game tournament on a gaming console, play a sport, meet at a shooting range or go hunting.

I haven't gamed in several years (after being a GM for roughly the same group of people for over a decade) and though we no longer meet to RPG, we're still in the same tight circle of friends and meet quite often for other activities. We just fully understand that the fun we had roleplaying was a priviledge of youth, and we can no longer afford the time and effort for this hobby.

[Lorsa]

There has to be tons of roleplayers in Ontario?

[JusticeZero]

I'm hearing these things:
1: You are sick of GMing.
2 Your players don't really care whether you GM;
3: ..they would rather play board games.
4: You do not like board games.
5: You do not know other gamers.

Point one says "Then quit GMing." this is a game. It's supposed to be fun.

Point two means this isn't an issue.

Three and four says "If you want to spend time with these people, do it doing something else."

Five is easy enough to solve. I can't look up gaming stores in your area because there is a lot of Ontario. Are we talking about the bit closeish to Detroit or the bit closeish to Winnipeg or one of the cities named Ontario? All of them you should be able to find a gaming store and pin up a notice on a board somewhere. If nothing else, carry a game book somewhere public and see if anyone asks about it.

[beachhead1973]

You can do what I did. My group broke up after we all graduated college when I was 24. I had an a son when I was 30. Now he is 17, and his friends make a good gaming group for me to DM. So basically, I waited more than 20 years to have a good gaming group. I still use all the old figures from the previous group, and the playing mat.

I can see that happening eventually, lol.

[beachhead1973]

Okay. Now, can you tell us what kind of game your players are interested in? You indicated there was a disconnect.

Okay, here is where it gets weird.

Previous to this we had another guy who GM'd all the time, it was a nice break for me. He ran Savage Worlds; a serious mystery-driven campaign with a lot of fighting where the PCs were always, by design it seemed, in over our heads. And a easier pickup game more like a dungeon-crawl, swords and magic stuff, but with an odd element of clan and settlement-building.

So based on that I take that they like a good story and aren't shy of combat, nor are they totally adverse to add-on mechanics.

Honestly, for a while I was taking it personally, because I felt like I was doing the same thing and they just hated me doing it.

It could have been the difference in systems. Savage Worlds is great for simplicity, but rough for versatility. I like GURPS for totally-freeform stuff, because there is a skill for everything. In retrospect, maybe they hated the system; they did complain about all the skills, but frankly, they never read their sheets.

[beachhead1973]

Looks like I was worried over nothing.

Had a good turn out last night and everyone was excited about the game, their characters and how I was tweaking the mechanic for the setting.

[Morgarion]

You can do what I did. My group broke up after we all graduated college when I was 24. I had an a son when I was 30. Now he is 17, and his friends make a good gaming group for me to DM. So basically, I waited more than 20 years to have a good gaming group. I still use all the old figures from the previous group, and the playing mat.

I recently contacted everyone I know in the area to try and put together a group. Zero interest. This is my new plan.

[vendur]

I recently contacted everyone I know in the area to try and put together a group. Zero interest. This is my new plan.

It's that simple, huh?


Haha.

some people have kids to carry on tradition. Some for reasons accidental. But I have a fiendishly clever plan. My offspring shalkl bring me home a great D&D group!

anyway.getting back to the OP, It sounds to me like burnout. but maybe not.

I know there are online RPG sites, one of them is something like rolld20 or something. Anyway, if you really want to DM and you think it's your players, that might be worth checking into, especially if you are in a low-pop area or just have no clue where to find another set of players.

Personally, i think it sounds like you just need a break in general. DM burnout is fairly common form my experience.

[JusticeZero]

Yeah, some games are online. My current game is. I keep bleeding players as fast as I can get them, though. (I have openings! Honest! I'm even adding playtest stuff!) How to find players is still a bit of a mystery no matter what you are doing. Try to get involved in as much as you can and hope that some people sticky and introduce you to the people that they know.