GiP Regulars as Wondrous Items

[LoyalPaladin]

What? None of these are illegal. Heck, even the Izforts come right back, the second is a gift at worst, and Red Fel's last scheme was to put sweaters on all of the cats in Sigil.

... I don't even... what did I just read?

Don't ever do that last one, by the way. I was mazed for weeks.

I wonder why. I heard the Lady of Pain loves cats.

Pfft, it's already out there among the stars, nomming on the vital leylines of the universe. It was a huge mistake, by the way.

A mistake is the least of it. All I do is stay on your floor once. Suddenly, I'm a vampire, you're pregnant, our child has 15 templates, and then pineapples!

Not with that level adjustment it isn't.

Do you have any idea how long I had to sit in the Abyss so I could farm enough XP to buyoff that adjustment?!

One of my new ghouls seems to answer to "Lug." To whom should I present him for examination to see if he's yours?

Oh dear... IZ is going to be unhappy...

I feel like you and Snowbluff are going to particularly enjoy something I'm still cooking for the Elder Evils thread... if I ever finish it.

Our child is probably an elder evil... Some terrible mix between Eternal Snow and The Most Loyal Paladin.

[Segev]

Our child is probably an elder evil... Some terrible mix between Eternal Snow and The Most Loyal Paladin.

I hear Olaf likes warm hugs.

[NeoPhoenix0]

I would like to say that i am very against the random slaying of janitors, especially the old ones. They have much wisdom to dispense on the people willing to listen to them.

[Zaydos]

Segev's Periapt of the Ghoul Walker
Price: 2,500 GP
Body Slot: Throat
Caster Level: 3rd
Aura: Weak; DC 17 Abjuration
Weight: 0.5 lbs.
Activation: -

This amulet, made from human bone, worn around the neck is inscribed with various prayers to the gods of death. When worn it protects the wearer against the paralysis of ghouls and ghasts (including gravetouched ghouls, lacedons, and other variations), as well as the stench ability of ghasts (and other ghoul-variants which possess it). In addition while worn you cannot contract ghoul fever, and are undetectable by the scent ability of ghouls, ghasts, and variants. As a final benefit while worn ghouls and ghasts do not instinctively take you as food making reasonable discussion that much easier.

Prerequisites: Create Wondrous Item, Remove Paralysis, Hide from Undead, creator must be able to Rebuke Undead
Cost to Create: 1250 GP and 100 XP. Seriously what should this cost? How do I determine it?

[Segev]

Segev's Periapt of the Ghoul Walker
Price: 2,500 GP
Body Slot: Throat
Caster Level: 3rd
Aura: Weak; DC 17 Abjuration
Weight: 0.5 lbs.
Activation: -

This amulet, made from human bone, worn around the neck is inscribed with various prayers to the gods of death. When worn it protects the wearer against the paralysis of ghouls and ghasts (including gravetouched ghouls, lacedons, and other variations), as well as the stench ability of ghasts (and other ghoul-variants which possess it). In addition while worn you cannot contract ghoul fever, and are undetectable by the scent ability of ghouls, ghasts, and variants. As a final benefit while worn ghouls and ghasts do not instinctively take you as food making reasonable discussion that much easier.

Prerequisites: Create Wondrous Item, Remove Paralysis, Hide from Undead, creator must be able to Rebuke Undead
Cost to Create: 1250 GP and 100 XP.

Ooh, I like it! So much easier than giving an amulte of prestidigitation to every single ghast one controlls to keep the stench down. And useful for those post-deal handshakes!

Seriously what should this cost? How do I determine it?

You've got two 2nd level spells in it, both related, and it's a reasonable slot. That's 3*2*2000+3*2*2000 for the base price (the 3*2 being caster level times spell level). We're ignoring the x1.5 for having a second element, because they're closely thematically related here. Add a further x.5 because of how specific the restriction is, as well as ignoring the Hide from Undead's duration-based x1.5 because it doesn't actually hide you; it just makes you seem like not-food to a particular subcategory of undead.

That brings it to 12,000 gp. I'm tempted to give it another ad hoc x.75 to get it down to 8k, because it doesn't seem worth 12k to me, though I will leave that to others to judge.

[IZ42]

Oh dear... IZ is going to be unhappy...

I WANT LUG BACKPlease

[LoyalPaladin]

I WANT LUG BACKPlease

I know, buddy... I know... But if you want him back, you'll have to kill segev and get Red Fel to resurrect him.

[Jormengand]

Legendary Regalia of the Immortal Emperor

The Legendary Regalia of the Immortal Emperor are greater artifacts and can't be created. Unlike other artifacts, they cannot be destroyed by any means whatsoever.

A spellcaster wearing the entire Regalia can spontaneously cast spells of their entire list; likewise can a manifester use psychic powers on their list whether or not they know them. Any creature wearing the Regalia is immune to the effects of the Dead, Disabled, Dying, Staggered and Unconscious conditions.

Bracers of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Arms
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Transmutation
Weight: 1 lb

The Bracers of the Immortal Emperor grant a +20 bonus on epic skill checks. The user can create automatically-resetting traps without increasing their price.

Cuiraiss of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Body and torso
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Abjuration and Necromancy
Weight: 0.5 lb

This item grants the wearer total concealment, and they may choose for each spell, power, spell-like or psi-like ability whether or not to be affected by it if they normally would be.

Anyone but the wearer who touches the wearer's tummy is slain instantly.

Mask of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Face
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Divination and Overwhelming Illusion
Weight: -

A creature wearing the Mask of the Immortal Emperor can see everything exactly as it really is, and can also see through any barrier short of 3 feet of lead, 12 yards of common metal, a mile of stone or an honestly obscene amount of paper or wood. The same is true of the wearer's senses of hearing and smell, and their touch and taste can't be fooled either. Further, anyone who would in any way perceive the wearer instead perceives something else of the wearer's choice.

Boots of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Feet
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Conjuration
Weight: 1 lb

The wearer of the Boots of the Immortal Emperor no longer needs to bother moving normally; they instead simply go to whichever location they wish as a free action. If they wish to move normally, they have infinite speeds in all modes of movement and a perfect fly maneuverability.

Gloves of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Arms
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Conjuration and Overwhelming Illusion
Weight: -

The wearer of the Gloves of the Immortal Emperor can create an Ice Assassin, as the spell, at will as a standard action. They can also do the same for Teleportation Circle and Gate.

Hat of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Head
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Abjuration
Weight: 1 lb

The wearer of the Hat of the Immortal Emperor is immune to mind-affecting abilities except those that they desire to affect them. They can cast all 3th-level or lower spells at will as spell-like abilities.

Pauldrons of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Shoulders
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Transmutation
Weight: 1 lb

The wearer gains a +30 bonus to each ability score.

Mouthpiece of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Throat
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Enchantment
Weight: 1 lb

The wearer can communicate anything to any creature as a free action. They may choose to force that creature to believe them, or to follow their orders so long as they sound at all reasonable in any way.

Belt of the Immortal Emperor
Body Slot: Arms
Caster Level: 30th
Aura: Overwhelming Conjutration
Weight: 0.5 lb

The Belt of the Immortal Emperor contains an infinite storage space, and also a copy of every non-unique mundane item ever to come to be. The same is true of every non-unique magic item with a market price below 10,000 GP. The items created from the Belt of the Immortal Emperor are tainted with Win and are unsuitable for sale, however. Those which were placed in the infinite storage space are not tainted with Win. Further, no item weighs anything while in the belt.

Items can be drawn from or returned to the belt as a free action.

[Honest Tiefling]

True, but I am, and I'm taking your side on this one.

Well, then. Through I admit to always being confused as to your gender and race so I think I'd prefer the paladin, actually.

[Zaydos]

You've got two 2nd level spells in it, both related, and it's a reasonable slot. That's 3*2*2000+3*2*2000 for the base price (the 3*2 being caster level times spell level). We're ignoring the x1.5 for having a second element, because they're closely thematically related here. Add a further x.5 because of how specific the restriction is, as well as ignoring the Hide from Undead's duration-based x1.5 because it doesn't actually hide you; it just makes you seem like not-food to a particular subcategory of undead.

That brings it to 12,000 gp. I'm tempted to give it another ad hoc x.75 to get it down to 8k, because it doesn't seem worth 12k to me, though I will leave that to others to judge.

Doesn't actually mimic the effects of either spell. It's much more restricted than either, gives you things they don't, doesn't give you most of the stuff they do. It's a unique effect which means that formula doesn't even apply which is why it's difficult.

Also Hide from Undead is level 1, so it should be (3*2*2000+1*1*2000)*1/2 which would give 7k, even that is probably high as it only helps against a single type of CR 1 or 3 creature. My ultimate reasoning was "Pit traps are more common and dangerous, so it's not much better than a Ring of Feather Fall." The stench immunity would be the big thing (since it enables use of them as minions better) but it's one of those things you can save against until you succeed and be immune for 24 hours.

[NeoPhoenix0]

I know, buddy... I know... But if you want him back, you'll have to kill segev and get Red Fel to resurrect him.

The janitorial union is not pleased. They want to hire your order to get Lug back. Also, I had to burn the paperwork they were trying to put through to give me a hearing about never officially joining or paying union dues...

[IZ42]

I know, buddy... I know... But if you want him back, you'll have to kill segev and get Red Fel to resurrect him.

Gladly.


Come here, Segev, I have a wonderful offer for you.

[atemu1234]

I WANT LUG BACKPlease

Wait, I disintegrated him! How in the nine is he now any type of undead?

[Snowbluff]

Well, then. Through I admit to always being confused as to your gender and race so I think I'd prefer the paladin, actually.

To be fair, the former is because I leave it intentionally blank to mess with people more than privacy, the the latter is racist.

... I don't even... what did I just read?

Sweaters on cats. I wanted to see the Lady of Pain smile. I bet she's cute when she smiles.

I wonder why. I heard the Lady of Pain loves cats.

Yeah, but most cats don't like sweaters.

[Zaydos]

And now I've got a very vague idea for a sealed evil in a can (Campaign Big Bad, possibly a literal Elder Evil) who was sealed in the Mazes by the Lady but has begun getting pieces out via cracks and is now using it as a fortress while it prepares for coming out in force and destroying the Great Wheel with the help of it's 42 servant IZes.

[Snowbluff]

And now I've got a very vague idea for a sealed evil in a can (Campaign Big Bad, possibly a literal Elder Evil) who was sealed in the Mazes by the Lady but has begun getting pieces out via cracks and is now using it as a fortress while it prepares for coming out in force and destroying the Great Wheel with the help of it's 42 servant IZes.

So, what, does the party have to get themselves mazed to get to the final dungeon?

[Zaydos]

So, what, does the party have to get themselves mazed to get to the final dungeon?

Possibly. Possibly it gets out and Sigil as it falls an infinite distance towards the Spire is the final dungeon. With it somehow actually managing to crash into the Spire and crack it during the fight, the boss attempting to escape into the Spire and the PCs having to stop all of the Planes from becoming undone because they're heroes, Bahamut condemn it! And "hopefully" resist the temptation to tap into infinite cosmic power which their finite minds cannot properly harness.

[unseenmage]

Wait, I disintegrated him! How in the nine is he now any type of undead?

Not sure about Undead but Disintegrate makes dust and one can turn dust into an Awakened Sand (Sa).

[Zaydos]

Wait, I disintegrated him! How in the nine is he now any type of undead?

Why Atemu with the newest from our catalog...

Segev's Balm of Bodily Restoration
Price: 4,000 GP
Body Slot: - (held)
Caster Level: 13th
Aura: Strong; DC 22 Necromancy Conjuration Healing should be Necromancy
Weight: 1 lbs.
Activation: Standard (manipulation).

This white powder when poured upon the impartial remains of a body, including such fragments as the dust left by a disintegrate or destruction spell, causes it to reform, the entire body becoming whole and extant again allowing magic such as Animate Dead or Raise Dead to work upon it.

Prerequisites: Craft Wondrous Item, Regenerate
Cost to Create: 2000 GP and 160 XP.

[atemu1234]

Not sure about Undead but Disintegrate makes dust and one can turn dust into an Awakened Sand (Sa).

Well, I now have something else to murder.

[Karl Aegis]

Keledrath's Automatic Valet
Price: 2,000 GP
Body Slot: -
Caster Level: 5th.
Aura: Weak; DC 18 Conjuration.
Activation: Standard (manipulation)
Weight: 1 lb.

This small box can be attuned to a specific non-living vehicle no larger than large size. The attunement is done by holding the box to the chosen vehicle and using a standard action. The attunement can later be changed at any time.

By using a standard action the attuned vehicle will appear in an adjacent square to Keledrath's Automatic Valet, ready to be mounted. Mounting the vehicle is free action. This is a conjuration (calling) effect.

By investing essentia into this item, the attuned vehicle's land speed increases by +10 feet for each essentia invested.

Prerequisites: Craft Wondrous Item, Mount, Creator must have an essentia pool.
Cost to create: 1000 gp and 80 XP.

[NeoPhoenix0]

Well, I now have something else to murder.

You know, it's not safe with a serial killer around. Especially one who serially kills the same person again. We need to do something about you.

[Karl Aegis]

You know, it's not safe with a serial killer around. Especially one who serially kills the same person again. We need to do something about you.

Force him to switch some of his levels to Ranger. That should slow him down while keeping the flavour.

[Marlowe]

Spoiler

Show

[Zaydos]

I have but one thing to say... Yay Farscape! Crichton was awesome.

I might be watching Season 10 of SG-1. Crichton isn't as insanely awesome in it. I still like him better than Jack. I didn't like Jack. The show is not as good as the early seasons, but it's better than 8, or the one with Jonas. Not that I disliked him, just that he didn't counter balance Jack properly.

[atemu1234]

You know, it's not safe with a serial killer around. Especially one who serially kills the same person again. We need to do something about you.

Bring it on, buddy. I need something to test my new claws on.

Force him to switch some of his levels to Ranger. That should slow him down while keeping the flavour.

Touch my levels and I end you. Well, I end you more slowly. With more sharp things.

[Marlowe]

[khadgar567]

Bring it on, buddy. I need something to test my new claws on.



Touch my levels and I end you. Well, I end you more slowly. With more sharp things.

just out of curiosity what is your build mate?

[Extra Anchovies]

just out of curiosity what is your build mate?

That information is above your pay grade. After a few years one or two decades several centuries uncountable ages some time here at GitP A.S., however...

nah, who am I kidding. We don't provide seniority benefits. We did, but that had to end due to fast-time demiplane problems.

[khadgar567]

That information is above your pay grade.

I am not asking that for my payment ( hell I have several kingdoms paying me already plus I am still try to spend the cash heisted from zaydos's lair) I ask it so I can send a cleric after the encounter to raise the useful ones