OOTS #1162 - The Discussion Thread

[The Aboleth]

Resist the urge to make an obvious joke...

I thought of that, but also couldn't think of a better word than "trump." Such are the limits of an English degree from a middling institution.

[Grey_Wolf_c]

Spoiler: This is too good to pass up

Show

I loved that film.

Once I learnt of the director's background and intended message, I love it even more.

Grey Wolf

[Fyraltari]

(Don't exclude the possibility of Fyraltari invoking a French rule of procedure. Inquisitorial, civil-law systems are weird.)

I'd have to ask my brother, I never got the hang of law.

Anyhow I like this version of the joke better:
Attorney: Was the man dead after he was beheaded.
Doctor: I suppose there is a possibility he could have become an attorney.

[Ruck]

It is claimed on the web (so it must be true) that this was actually recorded as said in a trial:

ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

A good time to share one of the funniest depositions of all time:

[Resileaf]

This is one of those rare occasions where the set-up and the punchline are the same, and it works perfectly.

[Mightymosy]

Birmingham, AL - the AL is Alabama.

Not Birmingham, UK.



Especially since the number of such arguments was already 0, so the ratio couldn't be smaller.

Grey Wolf

Whoops. Sorry, Peelee!

(Why must the americans copy all the European town names??

Oh, because it was people we exiled and they founded a new home, reminiscient of from what they were driven away from. Never mind

[Peelee]

Whoops. Sorry, Peelee!

(Why must the americans copy all the European town names??

Because the Europeans came here and were uncreative, I'd wager.

Central Alabama is actually pretty lousy about it, in the GBA alone there's Leeds, Inverness, Newcastle upon Tyne, etc. I'm joking, of course. Who in their right mind names their town Newcastle upon Tyne, that's a ridiculous name, just call it England Jr. and be done with it!

[SpectralTime]

...As someone who asked how, being a high-level cleric with her son in a papoose in front of her to provide a circumstance bonus, Hilya could blow a Will save that important... I am unreasonably pleased to hear my comment in joke form from the mouth of one of the most surprisingly-endearing characters in the comic so far. That's all.

[Mightymosy]

I'd have to ask my brother, I never got the hang of law.

Anyhow I like this version of the joke better:
Attorney: Was the man dead after he was beheaded.
Doctor: I suppose there is apossibility he could have become an attorney.

Oh, nice one! I have heard it before, but have forgotten it! Must use it now, next time I get an opportune situation

[Grey_Wolf_c]

Oh, nice one! I have heard it before, but have forgotten it! Must use it now, next time I get an opportune situation

The long form is also quite good, if you want to go for, well, the long form:

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

Grey Wolf

[Peelee]

We asked the guy to put the knife down nicely. He pulled a gun.

...that's now how escalation works. The guy has no reason to pull a gun. He would just keep holding the knife.

[Ruck]

...that's now how escalation works. The guy has no reason to pull a gun. He would just keep holding the knife.

Many of T_W's hypothetical scenarios do run into the problem of "being completely disconnected from how actual people would behave in a situation."

[Cazero]

...that's now how escalation works. The guy has no reason to pull a gun. He would just keep holding the knife.

Alternatively, if he feels like asking him to put the knife down means he isn't being taken seriously, pulling a gun won't help. Stabbing does.

[Fish]

If, hypothetically, we signed on to a statement that forced marriage is Bad, would that make the Weirdo shut up about it?

Seriously, we’ve tried everything else.

[The_Weirdo]

...that's now how escalation works. The guy has no reason to pull a gun. He would just keep holding the knife.

Tell that to There is a no-politics rule in this forum, one by which I will abide. It clearly didn't work in A given hypothetical and wholly fictional location. The sane often try remaining reasonable. It does not work.

[Grey_Wolf_c]

If, hypothetically, we signed on to a statement that forced marriage is Bad, would that make the Weirdo shut up about it?

Seriously, we’ve tried everything else.

Doubtful. He'd just come up with another thing no-one has said to propose solving with genocide. Heck, I doubt even all of us signing a "Hilgya is not just CG, she also should be the main character" would shut him up.

Grey Wolf

[The_Weirdo]

Doubtful. He'd just come up with another thing no-one has said to propose solving with genocide. Heck, I doubt even all of us signing a "Hilgya is not just CG, she also should be the main character" would shut him up.

Grey Wolf

Now who's putting words in someone else's mouth?

(Don't worry, Keltest's unique brand of interpreting statements means the above cannot be a rhetorical question unless I explicitly state it is, and then I might be lying)

[Ironsmith]

He pulls a knife, you pull a nuke and begin screaming at the top of your lungs. See if he doesn't back down.

The major problem with escalation is that you run the risk of the other guy responding in kind.

If you use extreme escalation, things get much more hectic much more quickly.

[The_Weirdo]

The major problem with escalation is that you run the risk of the other guy responding in kind.

If you use extreme escalation, things get much more hectic much more quickly.

Well, as I said, de-escalation did not work in what is doubtlessly a fictional setting.

[Keltest]

Now who's putting words in someone else's mouth?

(Don't worry, Keltest's unique brand of interpreting statements means the above cannot be a rhetorical question unless I explicitly state it is, and then I might be lying)

Im sorry, have you not actually been suggesting genocide as a response to perceived "oppression" this whole time? Because you've been doing an awfully good impression of it if that's the case.

[Ironsmith]

Well, as I said, de-escalation did not work in what is doubtlessly a fictional setting.

There's a major difference between de-escalating and surrendering. The former tends to be done much more gradually, for one.

But since we're talking about a fictional universe that is not OotS, Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, or a Marvel property, I think it best we just drop the subject.

[AutomatedTeller]

The_Weirdo is so pervasive that even putting him on your ignore list does not change the amount you are exposed to him.

[Grey_Wolf_c]

Now who's putting words in someone else's mouth?

Not me, given that my post contains not a single statement that I claim you have said that you have not actually said.

(Don't worry, Keltest's unique brand of interpreting statements means the above cannot be a rhetorical question unless I explicitly state it is, and then I might be lying)

This, on the other hand, is indeed an example of it.

Grey Wolf

[The_Weirdo]

There's a major difference between de-escalating and surrendering. The former tends to be done much more gradually, for one.

But since we're talking about a fictional universe that is not OotS, Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, or a Marvel property, I think it best we just drop the subject.

Well, going to the shrink. Talk later.

[KorvinStarmast]

...that's now how escalation works. The guy has no reason to pull a gun. He would just keep holding the knife.

My friends in Law Enforcement disagree with you. The person who pulls the gun is more likely to now be in control of the situation, as they have the edge on the person with the knife, so once the situation is under control, you actually end escalation.

In Law Enforcement (as opposed to In Hollywood) controlling the situation is how you prevent a lot of crime and some violent crime. (And it is also why most {good} cops call for back up ... they want to get control of a situation ... )

One of the few Hollywood treatments of this was embraced in Kilvinski's Law as seen in The New Centurions... with Eric Estrada, Stacey Keach, and George C Scott among others.

[Peelee]

My friends in Law Enforcement disagree with you. The person who pulls the gun is more likely to now be in control of the situation, as they have the edge on the person with the knife, so once the situation is under control, you actually end escalation.

In Law Enforcement (as opposed to In Hollywood) controlling the situation is how you prevent a lot of crime and some violent crime. (And it is also why most {good} cops call for back up ... they want to get control of a situation ... )

And you know what they say about knife fights, in any event.

[KorvinStarmast]

And you know what they say about knife fights, in any event.

I know what Butch says about them.

[Peelee]

I know what Butch says about them.

The losers dies on the street, the winner dies in the ambulance.

[KorvinStarmast]

The losers dies on the street, the winner dies in the ambulance.

Oooh, nice, keeping that one.

[Ironsmith]

The losers dies on the street, the winner dies in the ambulance.

And the meek shall inherit the earth... because everyone else got caught up in a pointless gunfight.