Things I May No Longer Do While Playing 13: This Is A Banned List Not A Drinking Game

[Rater202]

The incantations for my spells cannot be a description of what the spell does or an allusion to its effects translated into cockney rhyming slang.

[Mandark]

The incantations for my spells cannot be a description of what the spell does or an allusion to its effects translated into cockney rhyming slang.

*Or if it is, I must go over the list with the GM, who is allowed to veto any and all rhymes without argument.
**Must provide a card with the actual Information upon casting the spell, not a verbatim typed account of the cockney rhyming slang spell.
***I can do better than rhyming FIREBALL with FIREBALL.

[Rater202]

I was thinking they're more utility spells rather than the traditional fireballs and lightning bolts.

For example, if I remember my slang right "Pinky and perky brought bangers and mash from the army and navy for Uncle Fred and Johnny Rudder" would be an appropriate incantation, under these rules, to conjure a turkey dinner with mashed potatoes, gravy, and a side of bread and butter.

[Anonymouswizard]

I was thinking they're more utility spells rather than the traditional fireballs and lightning bolts.

For example, if I remember my slang right "Pinky and perky brought bangers and mash from the army and navy for Uncle Fred and Johnny Rudder" would be an appropriate incantation, under these rules, to conjure a turkey dinner with mashed potatoes, gravy, and a side of bread and butter.

And now I'm wondering 'what happened to the sausages'.

[Rater202]

And now I'm wondering 'what happened to the sausages'.

Oh, crap, that's right. "bangers and mash" is mashed potatoes and sausage.

I knew I was gonna screw something up with that.

[Telok]

Oh, crap, that's right. "bangers and mash" is mashed potatoes and sausage.

I knew I was gonna screw something up with that.

Miscast! Miscast! Roll on the wild mage table.

[Bohandas]

*Deep Thought did not leave off a zero

The incantations for my spells cannot be a description of what the spell does or an allusion to its effects translated into cockney rhyming slang.

**mainly because if it was than Sigil would just be overrun by randon spell effects

[Telok]

* No matter how accurate it is, I may not categorize all D&D "boss fight" loot & treasure of the last 6 months as "vendor trash" within the DMs hearing.


Seriously, other than healing potions every boss loot magic item we've gotten this year has been sold or traded because nobody wants them.

[Lord Raziere]

* My WH40k ministorum priest may not be a conwoman using their version of the Imperial Cult to make money
** May not offer redemption through the low payment of 19.99 thrones
*** Or nickel and dime people by offering "five thrones per sin forgiven".
**** May not convince people that donating to me empowers the God-Emperor
***** Chaos worship does not void the deal because "they're an economic competitor"
****** demanding exorbitant sums of money from to forgive all the sins of a recently deceased family member so they can go to the Emperor is right out.
******* May not point out that due to how the settings rules work, that if my religion gets popular enough that it might actually work in what purports to do.

[Socksy]

* My WH40k ministorum priest may not be a conwoman using their version of the Imperial Cult to make money
** May not offer redemption through the low payment of 19.99 thrones
*** Or nickel and dime people by offering "five thrones per sin forgiven".
**** May not convince people that donating to me empowers the God-Emperor
***** Chaos worship does not void the deal because "they're an economic competitor"
****** demanding exorbitant sums of money from to forgive all the sins of a recently deceased family member so they can go to the Emperor is right out.
******* May not point out that due to how the settings rules work, that if my religion gets popular enough that it might actually work in what purports to do.

I am fairly confident this is exactly how parts of the Ecclesiarchy already work in 40k.

******** May not do all of the above but in a game where everyone is Orks.
********* Mostly because it is even more likely to work.

[KorvinStarmast]

***I can do better than rhyming FIREBALL with FIREBALL.

Try rhyming it with {Thor} Heyerdahl.

I can no longer get into wrestling matches with tentacled lava monsters who are sitting in their pool of lava.

Spoiler: why this is such a bad idea

Show

I was on the way to being melted by lava when a fellow PC pulled me out of the over-temp spa treatment

[tyckspoon]

*Or if it is, I must go over the list with the GM, who is allowed to veto any and all rhymes without argument.
**Must provide a card with the actual Information upon casting the spell, not a verbatim typed account of the cockney rhyming slang spell.
***I can do better than rhyming FIREBALL with FIREBALL.

Fireball rhymes with 'shire wall.' Cockney rhymes often get contracted, because it's no fun if people listening to you actually know what you're rhyming, so cut it down to just 'shire'. Pick your favorite -shire to attach this to. Preferably one that is the home country of a well-known condiment, because with another rhyming substitution we can arrive at 'I cast Fireball at the boss' --> Worcestershire Sauce.

[Anonymouswizard]

* My Treasure cannot consist of an old walking cane, a typewriter, and my ex-girlfriend from twelve years ago who I just happened to bump into last week.

[Eldan]

Fireball rhymes with 'shire wall.' Cockney rhymes often get contracted, because it's no fun if people listening to you actually know what you're rhyming, so cut it down to just 'shire'. Pick your favorite -shire to attach this to. Preferably one that is the home country of a well-known condiment, because with another rhyming substitution we can arrive at 'I cast Fireball at the boss' --> Worcestershire Sauce.

And here I would have rhymed it with "tyre mall" and said that "shopping for tyres" is now murdering someone with flames.

[KorvinStarmast]

And here I would have rhymed it with "tyre mall" and said that "shopping for tyres" is now murdering someone with flames.

Not sure which RPGs have the necklace as a selectable action.

[Socksy]

* Devils don't have barcodes.

[KorvinStarmast]

* Devils don't have barcodes.

That would be a great T-shirt.

[PhoenixPhyre]

* Devils don't have barcodes.

** But drunkards in a sci-fi universe usually do.

Spoiler: Explanation

Show

Codes to a bar

[Laughing Dog]

* Devils don't have barcodes.

Not anymore, at least.

[Starlit Dragon]

If I attempt to get the attention of a blacksmith by slamming my hands on the anvil he's using, I should not be surprised when I take damage.

[Socksy]

That would be a great T-shirt.

Feel free to make it into one, if you are so inclined!

[Isikyus]

* My questgiver should not concoct excuses to avoid discussing the mission with the party she's hired
** She should at least not withhold crucial information
*** If she is secretly an evil cultist, she can't be so central to city politics the PCs can't afford to attack her.
**** Authority figures should not be so irritatingly evil-but-neccessary the PCs decide to side with the crazy necromancer instead
**** An NPC this important should not be accidentally killed by an animal companion in the goofy Christmas session

[Lord Raziere]

* May not create an excuse to randomly play the Jester of Bordeau's theme from Role With Me as often as possible

* May not make a character thats basically "Fate/Stay Night Gilgamesh but more more heroic and good"
** May not take the reaper class and have three 6th level spell lists and a PoW discipline through feats
*** May use unlimited wealth to get 10 of every weapon so with ceaseless ammo I can fire all of them limitlessly from my dimensional storage

[Bohandas]

*May not replace the party's healing potions with Folgers Crystals to see if they can tell the difference

[Anonymouswizard]

[QUOTE=Lord Raziere;25460338* May not make a character thats basically "Fate/Stay Night Gilgamesh but more more heroic and good"[/QUOTE]

Mainly because it's impossible to be more heroic than the King of Heroes.


* I may not spend all my points on extra mortal skills.
* Yes, having two points in Stabbing, four in Cool, and spending eight Will is probably going to let me win a thermonuclear war with a knife. No, I cannot put this to the test.

[Eldan]

* I may not spend all my points on extra mortal skills.
* Yes, having two points in Stabbing, four in Cool, and spending eight Will is probably going to let me win a thermonuclear war with a knife. No, I cannot put this to the test.

Not sure which system this is, but if you can win a thermonuclear war with a knife, you can also get enough defences to just parry all the nukes, so there's obviously no risk involved.

[DeTess]

* May not make a character thats basically "Fate/Stay Night Gilgamesh but more more heroic and good"
** May not take the reaper class and have three 6th level spell lists and a PoW discipline through feats
*** May use unlimited wealth to get 10 of every weapon so with ceaseless ammo I can fire all of them limitlessly from my dimensional storage

From my build for the same game:
*May not spend an irresponsible amount of build resources to be able to sneak attack someone from 40 miles away.

[Anonymouswizard]

Not sure which system this is, but if you can win a thermonuclear war with a knife, you can also get enough defences to just parry all the nukes, so there's obviously no risk involved.

Nobilis. Bringing a knife to a global thermonuclear annihilation fight is the example for a -5 skill penalty, whereas a really motivated person can spend all their Will for a +8. Cool is also a penalty to your opponent's skill roll, so using a knife against ICBMs is as disadvantageous as going up against the coolest person in the country.

If you're really freaking cool you don't have to parry the nukes, their targeting systems or detonators just malfunction on their own.

For added fun Skill 3 is professional level. You can pull this off as a mortal who isn't even very good with knives if you really want to. Especially as your average person has no points in Launch Missiles.

It makes a lot more sense for Nobilis though, who primarily pick up Cool via raising Aspect at a one to one ratio. Aspect 3+, possibly Cool 1, and 2-3 points in some kind of fighting skill is probably enough to parry the nukes. If you're the Power of Negotiations with Domain 4 you can probably just convince them to switch sides.

[Eldan]

I still never got to play Nobilis. Always too many games, not enough time.

[KorvinStarmast]

*May not replace the party's healing potions with Folgers Crystals to see if they can tell the difference

And this is why inventing the Chaotic alignment was necessary.