Celebrity D&D characters on wired.com

[lordmarcoos]

Wired decided to roll up the likes of Rick Astley, Mr. T, and a bunch of others. Worth taking a look at. I think Richard Dawkins, atheist and evolutionary biologist, is my favorite, because of this:

"Special Abilities: Spell Resistance Infinite (because magic is not real)"

Here's the link:
http://www.wired.com/culture/lifesty...=1&slideView=9

Discuss.

[Kurald Galain]

Too bad they didn't post feats and so forth. It's rather obvious from the entries that whoever wrote them didn't know D&D all that well, but they are nevertheless quite funny.

Paris Hilton's int and wis are lower than that. Her level should be 1 or so since she can't actually do anything well.

Bush... I'm not going into that argument here, but I'm sure a lot of people would see him as either lawful good, or lawful evil.

Steve Jobs's intelligence is way higher than that, but I fail to see how he's a paladin in any way. For some reason his entry doesn't list constitution; does that mean he is undead?

[FlyMolo]

[QUOTE=Kurald Galain;4152947
Steve Jobs's intelligence is way higher than that, but I fail to see how he's a paladin in any way. For some reason his entry doesn't list constitution; does that mean he is undead?[/QUOTE]
Yes.

Also, some of these are silly. 45th level human? What? You couldn't even survive to level that much with only human hit dice. You'd be killed to death by cats.

[metalbear]

I did love the part about the battle chair though.

[Guildorn Tanaleth]

You'd be killed to death by cats.

... as opposed to all of the times that they'd be killed by cats but survive?

[Chronos]

Too bad they didn't post feats and so forth.

They didn't include feats because there are no feats in the game. These are stats for AD&D.

That said, a lot of these stats seem to just be randomly rolled. An average Con score for Stephen Hawking? Paris Hilton smarter than Mr. T? A 16 Cha for a guy who managed to get himself elected to the most powerful position in the world, twice?

[DementedFellow]

When I read some of the comments on that site, it makes me a sad panda.

[Kurald Galain]

They didn't include feats because there are no feats in the game. These are stats for AD&D.

Fine - non-weapon proficiencies or secondary skills, then (and yes, I know those are optional rules, but everybody I've ever heard playing AD&D used either). The point still stands.

[FlyMolo]

They didn't include feats because there are no feats in the game. These are stats for AD&D.

That said, a lot of these stats seem to just be randomly rolled. An average Con score for Stephen Hawking? Paris Hilton smarter than Mr. T? A 16 Cha for a guy who managed to get himself elected to the most powerful position in the world, twice?

Yes, but a lot of people hate him now. Especially around the world. And he didn't win by much.(some people would say he didn't win at all.)

[xPANCAKEx]

You're all taking it far too seriously. Step away from the keyboard. Breathe. And accept that this is JUST the internet.

[Illiterate Scribe]

I preferred /tg/'s efforts in statting up of various turn of the century presidents. For some reason they make me lol uncontrollably:

Spoiler

Show

[HealthKit]

Aw c'mon, who doesn't think Bush is Lawful Evil and should have a much lower Int?
Ron Paul's stats are laughable as well.

[Sir_Elderberry]

I like what /g/ did with Cleveland, but I bet Theodore Roosevelt would be pretty epic.

[LibraryOgre]

The people who are going to bother to post are those who feel strongly. Thus, those who are fans of Ron Paul are going to post his stats, giving him great stats and what they see as a great alignment. Those who are not fans of GWB are going to post, giving him less than favorable attributes, because his fans don't feel as strongly about it. A certain amount of editorial bias is also likely.

[Ascension]

Mr. T's INT should definitely be higher, but he's better than most.

Note to self: Build next character as Mr. T.

[Admiral Squish]

Mr. T's INT should definitely be higher, but he's better than most.

Note to self: Build next character as Mr. T.

Yeah, but they messed him up. Fighter 9? You never take an odd number of fighter levels. Fighter 6, barb 10 works much better. Besides, T obviously has at least DR 2/-, because he's so ridiculously awesome.

[Chronos]

Yes, but a lot of people hate him now. Especially around the world. And he didn't win by much.(some people would say he didn't win at all.)

And something like 20% of the country still thinks he's doing a great job. And while both of his elections were close, the folks he narrowly beat would have 18 or more Cha in D&D terms, too. An 18 in an ability score just means that you're in the top half a percent of the population in that trait, and it takes more than that to even get taken seriously in a primary election, much less win. Realistically, any elected politician, or actor or other performer successful enough to be widely known, should have an 18 Cha.