Naruto IX: [Epilogue Intensifies]

[Ramza00]

no stop with that. I don't watch for the same reason as you, and I'm not going to be converted to your way of watching it.

I watch because I partly study to make stories and worlds myself. and thus I evaluate what makes worlds work and what doesn't. as well as to better understand these worlds for roleplays I conduct in them. I can't just ignore these things for your own preference of analysis. sure I like the cool shonen anime fights but if I want to understand them, I also need to understand the surrounding structure- and how it can be done better so I can do something similar to them to the best of my ability.

You are trying to build a different setting. Good for you.

I am talking about enjoying an existing setting and not trying to nitpick it to death. We are doing different things entirely. If you want to look for a flaw you will find it in every work created either with human hands or human voice. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I wish you the best Lord Raziere with your creations. ^{(Mentally sends you Major Alex Louis Armstrong energy to help with your creations.)}

[Rodin]

He canonically has a cell phone and doesn't charge it because he just forgets, though. Like, we can't just ignore that this is the reality of the world.

Well, that's just dumb then. Especially since there's a much better explanation sitting right there. Sasuke's lack of contact could easily be explained by his phone never having any signal. Up until 12 years ago, the world was at war to such an extent that they don't even have paved roads. The land outside the villages appears to very sparsely populated, possibly due to generations of war forcing people to live where there is protection. As such, cell phone coverage outside of major cities is really crap. Sasuke is also spending all his time in remote areas digging in archaeological sites looking for clues. It would be easy to say that Sasuke is rarely in contact because he literally cannot call.

[LaZodiac]

Well, that's just dumb then. Especially since there's a much better explanation sitting right there. Sasuke's lack of contact could easily be explained by his phone never having any signal. Up until 12 years ago, the world was at war to such an extent that they don't even have paved roads. The land outside the villages appears to very sparsely populated, possibly due to generations of war forcing people to live where there is protection. As such, cell phone coverage outside of major cities is really crap. Sasuke is also spending all his time in remote areas digging in archaeological sites looking for clues. It would be easy to say that Sasuke is rarely in contact because he literally cannot call.

Yup! They could have done it better. They didn't. Welcome to a statement that could be said about Naruto since the time skip into Shippuden.

[Traab]

Well, that's just dumb then. Especially since there's a much better explanation sitting right there. Sasuke's lack of contact could easily be explained by his phone never having any signal. Up until 12 years ago, the world was at war to such an extent that they don't even have paved roads. The land outside the villages appears to very sparsely populated, possibly due to generations of war forcing people to live where there is protection. As such, cell phone coverage outside of major cities is really crap. Sasuke is also spending all his time in remote areas digging in archaeological sites looking for clues. It would be easy to say that Sasuke is rarely in contact because he literally cannot call.

Yeah but then he wouldnt be as $*&@*& of a father which is a part of his character. Thats kinda the point, sasuke sucks as a human being in general. If they DIDNT want him to suck as a husband and father (are they married?) then he would at least check in once in awhile as even a distant father who is doing important things is not as terrible as a guy who cant be bothered to take 5 minutes out of his busy 12 years to talk to his kid.

[LaZodiac]

Yeah but then he wouldnt be as $*&@*& of a father which is a part of his character. Thats kinda the point, sasuke sucks as a human being in general. If they DIDNT want him to suck as a husband and father (are they married?) then he would at least check in once in awhile as even a distant father who is doing important things is not as terrible as a guy who cant be bothered to take 5 minutes out of his busy 12 years to talk to his kid.

Y... you know I don't think they actually are. Sakura chased after Sasuke and just kinda hung out with him and Hawk until she got pregnant and Karin delivered Sarada. Then Sakura went home. There is no actual talk of them ever getting married.

Sarada I'm sorry but you are a bastard child.

[Kantaki]

Y... you know I don't think they actually are. Sakura chased after Sasuke and just kinda hung out with him and Hawk until she got pregnant and Karin delivered Sarada. Then Sakura went home. There is no actual talk of them ever getting married.

Sarada I'm sorry but you are a bastard child.

How sure are we Sasuke was even involved that much?
I mean Sakura is a great medic.
Who knows what she cooked up in her spare time.

Maybe he didn't know about Sarada because nothing that could lead to her actually happened.

[Lord Raziere]

Y... you know I don't think they actually are. Sakura chased after Sasuke and just kinda hung out with him and Hawk until she got pregnant and Karin delivered Sarada. Then Sakura went home. There is no actual talk of them ever getting married.

Sarada I'm sorry but you are a bastard child.

Sasuke behavior makes even less when you remember as a child, he wanted to both kill Itachi and RESTORE HIS CLAN.

taking only one wife, knocking her up with a single child then wandering off for years is barely doing anything to accomplish that. like, Sakura, she could at least have been known as the one girl crazy enough to become the new Uchiha clan mother and endure having to raise a bunch of crazy Uchiha children for whatever weird badge of honor that is, but c'mon she wasn't even assertive enough to make him actually follow through on restoring his clan in the most enjoyable way possible?

and then there is Karin, why so monogamous, Karin can help to, its Sasuke Uchiha what does he care about social norms? he has the rinnegan and the only person in the world who can stop him from doing anything is tied up in paperwork, and does he really think Naruto is going to keep him from having two or more wives/baby mommas?

its not as if Sarada would be motivated to restore the clan, she wasn't raised as one, so it seems Sasuke has given up on his actual restorative goal for.......no reason. despite knowing two women still crazy enough to sleep with him.

[LaZodiac]

How sure are we Sasuke was even involved that much?
I mean Sakura is a great medic.
Who knows what she cooked up in her spare time.

Maybe he didn't know about Sarada because nothing that could lead to her actually happened.

Sasuke did actually have sex with Sakura, yes.

Sasuke behavior makes even less when you remember as a child, he wanted to both kill Itachi and RESTORE HIS CLAN.

taking only one wife, knocking her up with a single child then wandering off for years is barely doing anything to accomplish that. like, Sakura, she could at least have been known as the one girl crazy enough to become the new Uchiha clan mother and endure having to raise a bunch of crazy Uchiha children for whatever weird badge of honor that is, but c'mon she wasn't even assertive enough to make him actually follow through on restoring his clan in the most enjoyable way possible?

and then there is Karin, why so monogamous, Karin can help to, its Sasuke Uchiha what does he care about social norms? he has the rinnegan and the only person in the world who can stop him from doing anything is tied up in paperwork, and does he really think Naruto is going to keep him from having two or more wives/baby mommas?

its not as if Sarada would be motivated to restore the clan, she wasn't raised as one, so it seems Sasuke has given up on his actual restorative goal for.......no reason. despite knowing two women still crazy enough to sleep with him.

The only reason I can so much as like, even pretend to think is true, is that Sasuke is aware that the second hokage gave us the factual statement that biologically, every Uchiha is a hellish timebomb waiting to become Madara level at any moment. So he's minimizing that impact.

[Ramza00]

Sasuke behavior makes even less when you remember as a child, he wanted to both kill Itachi and RESTORE HIS CLAN.

taking only one wife, knocking her up with a single child then wandering off for years is barely doing anything to accomplish that. like, Sakura, she could at least have been known as the one girl crazy enough to become the new Uchiha clan mother and endure having to raise a bunch of crazy Uchiha children for whatever weird badge of honor that is, but c'mon she wasn't even assertive enough to make him actually follow through on restoring his clan in the most enjoyable way possible?

and then there is Karin, why so monogamous, Karin can help to, its Sasuke Uchiha what does he care about social norms? he has the rinnegan and the only person in the world who can stop him from doing anything is tied up in paperwork, and does he really think Naruto is going to keep him from having two or more wives/baby mommas?

its not as if Sarada would be motivated to restore the clan, she wasn't raised as one, so it seems Sasuke has given up on his actual restorative goal for.......no reason. despite knowing two women still crazy enough to sleep with him.

I agree so much.

Then again he was what 12 maybe 13 when he made that statement. Not many middle schoolers / child soldiers are really thinking correctly and planning out life goals in an accurate manner at that age. They are merely mimicking experiences they were taught by others at this age, that and having a form of hate that wants to negate and disavow what is wrong with their life at that point.

If Itachi, my big brothers killed my family ... I will now disavow him as a 12 year old and do the opposite with having lots of kids. Even if I as a 12 year old do not know what sex is yet, let alone the responsibility, duties, and obligations of being a father... I must disavow and do the opposite of the thing I hate.

[Lord Raziere]

The only reason I can so much as like, even pretend to think is true, is that Sasuke is aware that the second hokage gave us the factual statement that biologically, every Uchiha is a hellish timebomb waiting to become Madara level at any moment. So he's minimizing that impact.

More like make near impossible.

you need at least two Uchiha to get Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan. preferably ones that are closely related. without it, the Mangekyo goes blind real quick as Sasuke himself demonstrates when he used his ordinary mangekyo constantly all the way up until the start of the Fourth Ninja War, thats not a not a lot of time to find another Uchiha with the Mangekyo willing to trade eyeballs- and yes both Uchihas must have the Mangekyo sharingan to get EMS. you can't transfer a pre-Mangekyo to get EMS to one who already has Mangekyo.

so, Sarada, if she is to become Madara level has to basically 1. watch someone important to her die, which is one the more easily fulfilled conditions (so Boruto, Mitsuki, Naruto, Sakura, Cho-cho, just to nmae the obvious ones) 2. then transfer eyes with her father. but then again, all those Shin Uchiha clones exist now so.....guess this isn't a problem anymore because redeemed Kabuto is.....raising them.

huh.

yeah, that minimizing impact or Sasuke not reproducing thing really doesn't matter anymore, there is an entire orphanage full of shin clones with the sharingan. sure they look like creepy pale skin children now but the thing with beauty and attractiveness is that its about working with what one has and making it work for the people who like your type of beauty rather than anything objective.

[khadgar567]

At any rate, we've gone rather far from my original point. The schizo tech is clearly intentional, since we're in a universe where they apparently have made it all the way to miniaturized radio without discovering the wheel. Sasuke doesn't carry a cell phone with him because none of the ninja do, as that would break the medieval tech level the ninja fights are kept at. The level of civilian tech we see is totally incongruous with the military tech, all to justify one-vs-one wizard-ninja combat in an otherwise modern age setting. Exploiting high tech breaks that illusion.

medieval tech with light sabers and wind turbines generating power live, television, microwave ovens are we miss the industrial revolution or what. oh sorry you gents are following 100 or more chapters after the current one heck random chemist found a way to mimic orochimaru's cursed seals and you guys and gals are still discussing why sasuke can be with sarada 24/7 even youtube channels pass the point discussing why sasuke is worst dad then naruto about decade ago( like literally they never try to analize the problem like you.) you guys dicuss the same topic in last iteration of treat. sasuke currently kinda rogue ninja on self exile trying to solve problems you gents might never bother for you peace just archived and THE END but kishimoto kinda already pass the point you guys are stuck and writing better story then most of you dolts ever enjoy.

[Traab]

medieval tech with light sabers and wind turbines generating power live, television, microwave ovens are we miss the industrial revolution or what. oh sorry you gents are following 100 or more chapters after the current one heck random chemist found a way to mimic orochimaru's cursed seals and you guys and gals are still discussing why sasuke can be with sarada 24/7 even youtube channels pass the point discussing why sasuke is worst dad then naruto about decade ago( like literally they never try to analize the problem like you.) you guys dicuss the same topic in last iteration of treat. sasuke currently kinda rogue ninja on self exile trying to solve problems you gents might never bother for you peace just archived and THE END but kishimoto kinda already pass the point you guys are stuck and writing better story then most of you dolts ever enjoy.

You are a very strange creature. I would try to decipher your post, but doubt its worth the effort. Im assuming its some sort of whine about us debating aspects of an anime like there is a statute of limitations on wanting to talk about it but that cant be right as no such limit exists.

[khadgar567]

You are a very strange creature. I would try to decipher your post, but doubt its worth the effort. Im assuming its some sort of whine about us debating aspects of an anime like there is a statute of limitations on wanting to talk about it but that cant be right as no such limit exists.

most discussion depends on bleakbane's speed of watching it and since i dropped watching anime around end of pain arc. I kinda not intrested on most of beakbane anyls of the every cringy moment of anime and considering you guys kinda repeat the same discussion on sasuke second maybe third time i kinda rant about the topics you stuck.

[Ramza00]

most discussion depends on bleakbane's speed of watching it and since i dropped watching anime around end of pain arc. I kinda not intrested on most of beakbane anyls of the every cringy moment of anime and considering you guys kinda repeat the same discussion on sasuke second maybe third time i kinda rant about the topics you stuck.

2.020 You Can (Not) Advance

[khadgar567]

2.020 You Can (Not) Advance

well nice joke but still you huys need to speed up a bit.

[Aotrs Commander]

well nice joke but still you huys need to speed up a bit.

No, we really don't.

[khadgar567]

No, we really don't.

do you mean "No, I really don't" as in half of the chat is on boruto saga and only few people are still struggling to finish the naruto series.

[Ramza00]

do you mean "No, I really don't" as in half of the chat is on boruto saga and only few people are still struggling to finish the naruto series.

We do not need to synchronize with your schedule or the rest of the fandom schedule. Much like my exposure to Star Wars was the 1995 VHS box set and thus 9 year old me was 18 years behind SOME of the fan subculture.

What is the musical lyric again?

🎵 Wait for it Wait for it
Wait for it Wait for it
I am inimitable I am an original
Wait for it Wait for it
Wait for it Wait for it
I'm not falling behind or running late 🎵

—————

This is not Camelot, but just as a reminder none of the original knights of the round table obtained the Holy Grail. It was the next generation that succeeded at that quest.

[LaZodiac]

Given that literally the only time Boruto is ever really brought up, it is by me and Ramza who are the only people who read the manga OR in the context of how the change over from Naruto to Boruto involves a lot of weird ****ery (Sasuke trying to murder his own flesh and blood child since he didn't know she was his) and oddly poignant moments (of all the characters in the series, Orochi is somehow the best gender-fluid parental figure who loves their dumb snake son) punctuated by the dumbest ****ing stuff in the world (Naruto had VCR and CCT cameras, a cyberpunk city that's always raining, cellphones but no cars, Boruto has introduced DVD players, chainguns, and lightsabers but sitll no cars).

So I think we can chillax on the "everyone catch up to this bimonthly series no one likes beyond analyzing it as some sort of performance art on why some series shouldn't have sequels" thing.

This post is of course ignoring the Boruto anime almost entirely beyond Orochi's son, but that's because I don't watch it and because it literally takes a season to get to where the manga gets and that's just really weird.

[Silverraptor]

This is an open discussion thread on the Naruto universe. You're allowed to skip over people's responses if you're not interested. I ignored Bleakbane for quite a while when he was covering filler, because I wasn't interested in the filler. If you have a question or a comment to make that isn't related to what other people said previous, you can just post a comment on it at anytime. What's great about a forum is if people are interested in what you have to say, they'll comment on it. If they aren't they can skip it. The whole point of this thread is just to have friendly discussions on a piece of media that we like. Some people are more passionate about it then others, and that's alright too. Everyone has their own tastes and everything.

[Rodin]

This post is of course ignoring the Boruto anime almost entirely beyond Orochi's son, but that's because I don't watch it and because it literally takes a season to get to where the manga gets and that's just really weird.

I read an interesting post on Reddit about the Boruto anime when I was trying to work out where the filler arcs are. Apparently, all of the anime is canon, because they are officially not going to try to write filler arcs around a bimonthly series. So events are different in the anime, and they aren't going to pretend that they aren't. It isn't like Fullmetal Alchemist, where the anime has just taken off and is doing its own thing. The events in the manga will eventually get covered, and Kishimoto is involved with the anime. There just isn't going to be any nonsense like Hinata learning a new jutsu and then forgetting about it because of manga canon.

[LaZodiac]

I read an interesting post on Reddit about the Boruto anime when I was trying to work out where the filler arcs are. Apparently, all of the anime is canon, because they are officially not going to try to write filler arcs around a bimonthly series. So events are different in the anime, and they aren't going to pretend that they aren't. It isn't like Fullmetal Alchemist, where the anime has just taken off and is doing its own thing. The events in the manga will eventually get covered, and Kishimoto is involved with the anime. There just isn't going to be any nonsense like Hinata learning a new jutsu and then forgetting about it because of manga canon.

Yeah they've been doing that since Shippuden... which sucks, because hey cool the slug tailed beast shows up in the anime.

And it's completely excised from the manga for no reason.

I just don't like stuff when you need to participate in two streams of information for the same piece of media to get everything. It's like how Bleach had Kira show up as a zombie and there's like, no explanation (or point) except if you read an obscure, not translated novel.

Also truth be told the less Kishimoto touches this the better. Samurai 8 is atrocious and a sign that whatever Kishimoto had, he lost and lost hard.

[Ramza00]

Yeah they've been doing that since Shippuden... which sucks, because hey cool the slug tailed beast shows up in the anime.

And it's completely excised from the manga for no reason.

That is nothing from Naruto. For example the Ten Ten vs wind girl in the chunnin exams (Ten Ten vs Temari), happened off panel in the Naruto Manga. No fight shown, lots of talking about the fight pre fight saying Ten Ten is strong but the Sand ninja also strong, and suddenly Temari is shown defeated Ten Ten. Ten Ten unconscious body atop of Temari’s fan, weapons all over the ground. This single scene took up 2/3 reds of the Manga page. It is like having a 3x3 grid and 6 panels are Ten Ten’s defeat in an embarrassing way. The 3 panels at the bottom is Naruto surprised, the sand ninjas thinking this is to be expected, followed by the 3rd Hokage also surprised.

So yeah nothing new and like you LaZodiac I find this also to be frustrating. FMA manga and brotherhood did everything better, though I still adore Naruto despite its flaws.

[Rodin]

That is nothing from Naruto. For example the Ten Ten vs wind girl in the chunnin exams (Ten Ten vs Temari), happened off panel in the Naruto Manga. No fight shown, lots of talking about the fight pre fight saying Ten Ten is strong but the Sand ninja also strong, and suddenly Temari is shown defeated Ten Ten. Ten Ten unconscious body atop of Temari’s fan, weapons all over the ground. This single scene took up 2/3 reds of the Manga page. It is like having a 3x3 grid and 6 panels are Ten Ten’s defeat in an embarrassing way. The 3 panels at the bottom is Naruto surprised, the sand ninjas thinking this is to be expected, followed by the 3rd Hokage also surprised.

So yeah nothing new and like you LaZodiac I find this also to be frustrating. FMA manga and brotherhood did everything better, though I still adore Naruto despite its flaws.

That's a little bit different - that's simply expounding upon the canon event of Ten Ten's defeat. I wouldn't describe the episode where they fight to be a filler episode. Late Shippuden was actually doing entire filler arcs and then referencing them later during canon manga scenes.

[Ramza00]

That's a little bit different - that's simply expounding upon the canon event of Ten Ten's defeat. I wouldn't describe the episode where they fight to be a filler episode. Late Shippuden was actually doing entire filler arcs and then referencing them later during canon manga scenes.

I agree. Under some definitions of filler it is filler, under my definition it is not, but so much of Naruto and Shippuden is Filler and I am trapped, I can read only the manga and miss things, or I can watch the anime and get some filler that is good and some it is very bad.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Life is suffering, but it can also be more than suffering, I am glad Naruto added to my life but I would polish off some of it if I could rewrite / redo it.

2.020 You Can (Not) Redo [Naruto]

———

Sidenote I only watched the anime conditionally after the filler six tails vs deva pain episode.

[Traab]

I hate how much character growth the filler had in naruto only to not count. Like, the bikochu beetle arc alone was valuable if for no other reason than IT MADE NARUTO NOTICE HINATA! Like, I dont think it went into romance, but he saw a pretty nekkid girl dancing on the water and got to see hinata be strong. All in one arc! Lets also not forget the sheer volume of alliances the leaf village should be enjoying all because naruto has effectively seduced every female leader other than tsunade and (maybe) mei. Land of vegetables, demons, snow/spring, whatever that land with the "ghost" samurai was, the fuma clan, im probably missing others, naruto has probably done more for world peace through saving thirsty women than the sage of six paths did all his life, all before he was capable of going more than 3 tails without going nuts.

[Aotrs Commander]

Bleakbane Catches Up With Naruto

Okay! So a bit of google searching suggests that Naruto the last fist in after episode 493. Now, inconvenitantly, that would fall part-way through my usual 3-episode sequence, so I think I might fit it in after 491 instead.

Onwards, then!

Naruto and Hinata

Off to a good start - ten minutes of chibi-Naruto doing sweet FA, followed by his first meeting with Hiruzen.

Then it's Hinata's turn, so naturally, we start with Neji. Because of course.

Neji sees Hinata at her birthday party, and then it's his dad's funeral, and Hinata runs off into the snow.

Good parenting, everyone, let the three year old who JUST nearly got kidnapped run off without anyone noticing, in the clan famed for their eyes.

Where do I even.

She runs crying into the snow where she is found by Naruto (for the first time) who takes her home.

And that's it.



Y'know, I was belabouring under the impression that this episode might actually be building the relationships up or something.

The more fool me...



Frack, there's four of these episodes, this is going to be excruciating, isn't it?



Sasuke and Sakura

Oh, settle in for the pulse-pounding thrill of this episode!

The never-ending excitement of Sasuke and Itachi Throwing Some Kunai!

Itachi cooking dinner (way too much dinner!)

And Having A Sleep-over In The Back Garden!

(I'm stopping halfway to write this and I'm not sure I remember much of the last ten minutes because LICHEMASTER, the pacing is awful.)

Okay, like, I have gone on record as saying that I disagree with the statement that only people being unhappy makes for good entertainment. But ye gods, having characters Richard around and interact is fine so long as SOMETHING is happening. Like, at ALL. Mostly silence, long shots and deliberately cutting AWAY from anything that might be interesting does not, however. It's like they went out of their WAY to present this all in the most minimised animation, soporific fashion. Throwing the kunai? No, just see them hitting the target. Cooking the dinner? No, just shots of the finished food. Eating the meal? Skipped. ANYTHIMNG interesting conversationally that's not just the same old thing from every other flashback? Nope.

Guh.

So, the second ten minutes are either microscopically more interesting (Sakura made her own little den!) or I'm so bored it feels like that. Although Ino is in this bit, which helps.

But basically, this is again just boiled down to Sakura has dinner with parents, Ino gives Sakura her bow, Sakura has dinner with parents, Sakura shows Ino her den and lets slip she has a crush on Sasuke, Sakura fails to confess/is rejected by Sasuke and runs past Naruto (while the entirely inappropriate music-that-plays-when-cool-stuff-happens-plays) and punches trees and possibly punches Naruto.

Again, the show seems to be deliberately trying to go for shots and backdrops for little to no animation, with repetition and minimal dialogue, so that even minorly intesting things like Ino re-arranging flowers happens off screen while the camera gormlessly focus at Sakura. It is once again, trying to be clever and just ends up being dull.



Gaara and Shikamaru

Okay, how is this even going to work? The last two episodes were at least sort of linked by character pairs, but Shika and Gaara never met as children... And the only link they have is Temari! I was sort of expecting a character piece of the pair of them bonding, since it would be obvious that Temari and Shika were going to get married and stuff like that, so if this is just ten minutes of each of their childhoods, what even? (I mean, if they're doing that SURELY it ought to have been Temari and Shikamaru...?)

No, no, this is literally what we're doing, two completely disconnected things.

Gaara is playing in the sand with Temari and Kankuro, and is using his sand-bending. Kankoro has him make sand food, and then, in the highlight of this bit, has him make sand-poo (and of course we are denied seeing this...) His dad then calls the two away, and some asshat chucks a rock at Gaara for being the wierd kid - Gaara catches it with his sand naturally - and I'm just thinking what kind of asshat does that when someone else from the shadows chucks some kunai at him.

Then Yashamaru and Gaar eat dinner, and Gaara askes child-question to which Yashamaru, terrible parent that he is, answers with nonsense. Gaara plays in the sand some more, Temaru and Kankoro aren't allowed near him and then Yashamaru shows up with lunch.

FRACK, this was dull.

We finally arrive at the dubious best of today, the Shikamaru bit. To this bits barely-present credit, it is at leat mildly interesting, as it concentrates on the interaction of Naruto. Shika and Chouji at the academy. Shika is bored, so he lobs a pencil and Chouji, who is sleeping and is then caught, Shika sniggers, which results in Chouji throwing stuff at him. (Again with the bizarre framing, we focus on Shikamaru and only see the objects fly in from off-screen, thus rendering this in the least visually interesting style.) Naruto tells them to knock it off, he's trying to sleep here, and Iruka sends all three outside, where they share crisps and a further bollocking when they fall asleep outside.

Presumably another day, Naruto is busy defending Hinata from bullies, and Shikamaru grumbles that he should mind his own business and he's stupid. Chouji, bless his cotten-socks, leaps to Naruto's defense, saying Naruto isn't stupid, Shikamaru said himself everyone has a part and to take it back. They actually get into a bit of a scrap about it, which Naruto, bless HIS cotten socks, tries to defiuse (and sort of manages). They hang around for a bit after school, ambling along. Shikamaru spots something.

And, in the ONLY bit of this whole shebang that sort of works, we see that it is Ino trying to give Sasuke a flower and being shot down. For the only time today, the silence, her non-reaction, side from a silent tear actually WORKS a little bit. Then she hears Naruto and company cracking jokes and predicatbly goes ballistic. But AGAIN, the show more or less Scooby Doos this, with the boys running off-screen while noises happen and then run back on again.

After escaping, they spot Iruka sensei apparently being chatted up by what seems to be implied is ladies of the night, so they get their revenge with Narutos sexy jutsu.

Later, Shika and Chouji says goodbye to Naruto, and in the thoughtless way children do, Chouji invites Shika to dinner. Naruto stares blankly for a moment, then waves. End episode.



Yeah, this... This was a really bizarrely dull trio of episodes, and not remotely what I was expecting. I was expoecting character vignettes, yes, but in context of them interaction as adults post-Ninja War on a mini-adventure (like is all teased in the intro, with cool stuff like showing Lee, then TEMARI then Tenten ike they would for a team, and them all being, like older and stuff)or just chatting or something. Not... This.

What makes the whole thing worse is the abyssmal direction and framing. Bearing in mind I know exactly jack and squat about direction, but even I can tell this is bad. They can do better - the intro and outro literally are better animated and shot, for a start. I can't honestly believe that this was done for purely budgetary reasons, which makes this an artistic decision that just... Utterly fails and actively makes the episodes worse. I can only assume that this was motivated by artistic pretension over any level of technical competance.

Filler in the truest sense of the word, since nothing of interest happens, and anythign with a shred of merit is framed in the most boring way possible, with minimal dialogue and just nothing, with way too many static shots of people staring for about twice as long as making the point is needed or just of the background while people talk inanely.


...


Still better than Pain's backstory, though, and I'm not exaggerating, if you recall, I had to watch those episodes one-by-one, because I could not stand more than twenty minutes of that tripe.



One more of these unconnected drivels to go next time (Jiriya and Kakashi) and the the next episode is called the exploding human, so that ought to be at least worth a giggle because SOMETHING ought to happen.

[Rodin]

I have no memory of these episodes. I think I actually skipped them entirely...maybe I watched a few minutes of the first and noped out of there.

The exploding human stuff is good though. IIRC, it's from a short story written after the manga ended.

[Aotrs Commander]

I have no memory of these episodes. I think I actually skipped them entirely...maybe I watched a few minutes of the first and noped out of there.

I'm not surprised.

The exploding human stuff is good though. IIRC, it's from a short story written after the manga ended.

I know they adapted stuff from some of that Shikamaru Gaiden or something, I think - I just sort of expected that to have started right away not do... What ever these four episodes are.



Bleakbane Catches Up With Naruto

Hey, a relatively sensible rate of progression! Also, I want to get the next episode out of the way...

Jiraiya and Kakashi

(Break from tradition, I'mma watch this BEFORE supper...)

Yeah, this is more of the same.

Jiraiya tries to get Orochimaru to peep on girls at the hot spring and gets caught and hot water trhown on him. (Again, we see the lady throw the bucket off-screen and Jiraiya's yelps off-screen.)

Jiraiya tries to get Roachy to pretend to attack Tsunade so he can dive in and be the hero (and it goes about as well as you'd expect). The animation seems really off here as well, and unusually, the mouth-flaps don't seem to fit well.

The pre-sannin discuss their dreams (which a few seconds too long shots of trees in the background) - and then they get attacked! Hot damn, a fight scene!

A really bad fight scene! That ends with Sounds of Fighting while the shot lingers on a tree with the moon in the background. For longer than the time they bothered to animate it.

Kakashi!

Kakashi cooks dinner! Kakashi does chores! We literally see him cleaning his toliet, because that was enitrely necessary!

There is a brief spar with Hoiruzen - this is apprently pre-genin academy - while Rin and Obito watch. (Naturally, the spar happens mostly off-screen.)

Kakashi goes fishing (thrilling!) while Obito and presumably Rin watch him from the shadows. Kakashi is Good At Fishing! (As Obito stalks him to get there, they move through what I'm 95% sure is the same alley backdrop as on the Shikamru part where they saw Ino, and I'd wager (but there's no frickin' way I'm checking) down to the people in the background.)

Kakashi goes home and cooks dinner and invites the other two in. Kakashi is Good At Cooking!

Kakashi does his chores again (oh, that second Kakashi-cleans-his-loo scene is the single most pivotal and necessary scene in the entire 700-something episode anime) and then goes to the academy (through stock footage).

He OHKOs Guy when Guy starts on him (even Guy's presence fails to make this better).

Next day, he visits his father's grave. (We are spared a third "cleans-the-loo" sequence.)

Next day, Guy picks a fight with him and does better. Naturally, the episode finishes on a lingering shot of Obito and Rin watching gormlessly (with little animation) - for a good number of seconds - while the fight happens off-screen.

The show then says "the end."

I can't repeat what my instant heart-felt comment to that was, except that the first word was "thank" and the second began with "f" and ended with "k" and was NOT "frack."



These episodes are so weird, it's like a different show. The animation is minimal and poor when present, nothing interesting happens, not even from a character vignette sense. The crawling pacing and stubborn determination not to show ANYTHING visually interesting completely kills stone dead these moments in a way even the show's normal flashbacks can't achieve.

It's wierldly, bizarrely bad.

These episodes, fall into the "never watch them again" category, along with episode 13 of Naruto (the Konohamaru documentaty pre-Forest of Death clip show) and the four-episode series recap.

Let's move on to something where stuff might actually happen, shall we?

Which is...

A SASUKE ARC?

A SASUKE ARC?!



OH FOR-!



The Exploding Human

We start out with grainy black-and-white footage, during which Japanese Text Happens. Sure whould be nice to know what it said, wouldn't it?

*sigh*

After the intro, we actually start off really nicely actually, with Older Naruto and Sakura meeting with Kakashi-Hokage to talk about Leaf nin going missing. And, kaboom, explosion, so they rush off to the gate, where they see the gate guards fighting with a load of shambling dudes (that presumably only we can see the red eye glows), but doing so very defensively.

It becomes obvious why, as Team Ten show up and Ino...

*eyeglow blink*

*eyeglow blink*

... recognisies one of them as one of her regular customers who went missing. One of the gate guards relcantly chucks a shuriken at him (in a mostly-non-vital area) but he not only takes it dead on, but rips it out and starts to, like, clearly expand ready to blow. Naruto rushes into yoink the gate team otu of the way - but bad news - the shrapnel is about to set the next three off, and they've now entered the village itself. We're treated to a team effort of Naruto and Chouji being, frankly FRICKIN' AWESOME as they blast the explosion away. Uh-oh, though, four more. Hinata shows up, and does a scan and sees only they're chock-full of an alien chakra that Naruto can't just, like, whip out of them.

So Shika, Naruto and Hinata team up to take them down efficiently and without bloodshed.

In the medical bay, Sakura can't do anything for them, so Kakashi decides they need to call in someone who might be able to see things they can't - Sasuke. So Sai sends him a message via ink-bird.

Sasuke is currently remembering that last confrontation, while feeding some cats (presumably from the village we're about to see nearby).

Er, Sasuke, I'm... not sure cats should be eating rice...?

He just has time to read the message before - kaboom - the aforementioned village is under attack. Sasuke hops up to watch what's going on, including some hapless pillock stabbing one and getting blown to smithereens. A crazy old man is screaming for a massive dude and a tiny girl to do something, so the latter creates a waterwall to hold them off. Sasuke drops down to try and find out what the hell, but the old man assumes he's behind it and has the other two attack him. This does about as well as you'd expect, but Sasuke shows remarkable restraint in just no-selling their attacks. Of course, all this does is buy the suicide zombies time to shamble through the walls.

Sasuke is like "you're gonna tell me what's going on," right after he just Sharingarns the zombies down in one glance. Because of course, he's Sasuke Fracking Uchiha, possessed of HAX that even Ash Ketchum is like "leave it out, mate..."

The old man, who is stupid, still refuses to help, but the tiny lady explains that she and her companion are ex-shinobi performance artists, who just happen to be staying in the village.

Dozy old coot finally remembers, hey, they should check on the women and children. Said noncombatans come boiling out of the sfae house, because Old Codger's daughter is a bomb. She shambles out, then stabs herself in the neck and explodes. (Sasuke, dude... You totally could have stopped that, you're just being a Richard.) The old man screams about some guy's name and how he'll never forgive him and then runs into the burning house, apparently to his death, because he is a complete moron whom Reality is better off without, good riddance.

Sasuke finally gets some answers from someone else about a "lightning gang" who used to play Robin Hood until Mist have them a drubbing. The old man sent them away when they came for help (I mean, honestly, I DO have a little symapthy for not wanting to get involved, this could well be during the Bloody Mist period where it could have gotten the whole village murdered by a mini-Zabuza or insane Yagura or something.)

Sasuke decides that in order to get some information, he needs to extract it from the memoires of the explode-y humans, because he can just do that with the sharingarn now. Because of course he can.

This doesn't go well, though, as he runs into some sort of Bad Possessing Demon image (the sudden-change of Sasuke's mentel perception to tsukiyomi-like red cannot be a good thing), but he breaks out and says it must be kekkei genkai.



Notable here that the animation is back to normal, which makes the last episodes even more utterly bizarre. There is no laziness with the animation, hair blowing in the wind, varying shots of people talking (like when Naruto and Sakura are talking to Kakashi), basically everything you'd normally expect from direction in, like, anything - which just serves to further underline the insanely off-kilter last four episodes of bizzaro-world strangeness. And I say again - I am not remotely skilled in art direction, like at all. Anything I know is osmosed from the occasional bit of Funny Internet Reviewers and a little bit from 30 years of panto about how to not having everything be static. The fact that I picked up on the wierd direction from the last episodes is quite marked.



Coliseum

(Spelled totally wrong...)

Anyhoo, Sasuke sends an update to Kakashi in his usual terse fashion that, like, he's doing this on his own, because of course he is.

He trudges off, with the small female and the big dude following, because they're insistent on seeing this through - the old git's daughter was kind to them and cooked them nice food.

Sasuke basically ignores them (well, her chattering away like Pinkie Pie)- after all, he's dealt with Naruto and Sakura, this is peanuts.

Until the lass starts calling him "Sassy." Ahahahahahaha! Nice.

He eventually tells them they can do what they want, but not to call him that. To which she - who is literally, like half his height and Sasuke ain't that tall - replies "I'm older than you, so I can if I want." (I'd sort of figured this already after my initial impression she was a kid or something.) The chap whispers in Sasuke's ear and his eyes widen and he goes "by that much, huh?" Which is like the Sasuke-Speak for Comical Naruto Overreaction Face. (Ahahahahahaha!)

Anyway, he's off to see the Orochimaru for information of the name that he got out of the guy earlier. Yamato - hey, Yamato, long time no see! - is there on guard duty, but he lets Sasuke through without much effort.

Orochimaru is making the most this, clearly enjoying himself and nothing but amused at Sasuke being all abruptly, with no preamble "tell me what you know." Roachy says the dude is likely in the employ (I think) of this big weapons merchant, who is secretive even my Roachy's standards. He can arrange a way to catch this weapons guy, but it'll take a him a bit. So he wanders off, and we're "treated" to the arrival of ex-Hawk minions. Karin immediately feels threatened by the small lady (yes, sure... Look, even IF Sasuke was currently looking to restore the clan, pretty sure "easily mistaken for jail-bait loli" is kind of not his type...) Again, to my great amusement, Orochimaru comes in and isn't actually amused when he tells them to knock it off.

He's arranged a way of possibly meeting the bloke, but it means field trip to an island playground for rich people (and Karin and co are staying behind, oh no, what a shame). On the trip there, Roachy and Sasuke have a little chat, and Orochimaru casually informs us Kabuto is now in charge of an orphanage and...

No, sorry, hang on ARE YOU KIDDING ME, you put KABUTO in charge of VULNERABLE CHILDREN? No, no, I don't care how magic the Izanagi-counter-thingy is, there is just crap you don't DO!

(Even Sasuke's reaction is wide-eyed incredulity, but then he DID see Kabuto in full-on crazy-snake-sage mode himself.)

Anyway, Roachy observes that he, Kabuto and Sasuke are around because not everything can be beaten by Talk no Jutsu and hope. (I mean, he's not wrong, somethings you can't.) He seems deeply amused about not being quite as Evil now, though.

So, turns out that the rich people are playing gladiator with their own shinobi, with the losing ninja being lost to the winner's master. Sasuke is clearly a bit disgusted by this, but the little lady is like "if you stand by and do nothing, you're as bad as they are." I mean... With great power comes great responsibilty to use that power, so she's not, like, wrong...

She storms off and Orochimaru is like "aw, too much for the little girl," and Sasuke's like "she's older than me, dude," and hilariously Orochimaru is like "seriously, are you freaking joshing me"-face.

Anyway, next match up, it's the arms-dude's ninja (because he collects kekkei genkai) and the other ninja is... Sasuke, as waged by Orochimaru.

Come on, Sasuke, did you seriously not see this coming?

Roachy, is of course, having a right old high time of this, because he knows as well as Sasuke this is a perfectly legitimate way in, and its not like Sasuke is in any danger from some random ninja. (Really, you got to question the sanity of a dude who think he can just "collect" Sasuke Freaking Uchiha, the second-by-a-tiny-margin strongest person on the frelling planet.)

So Sasuke is like "tch," and jumps down (and thus keeping his perfect record of turning up late to matches). The other ninja starts off by blasting solid fog jutsu, which mildly damages a bit of Sasuke's cape.

Then to my genunie surprise, things are interrupted by the CEO winner of the first match suddenly becoming an exploding human. Cliffhangar!



Okay, despite my pointed remarks, this is solid stuff, even with Sasuke. He's only being moderately stoic here, not emo, and so he's tolerable, and this is an interesting story. (I mean, it's just that as of right now, Roachy has had more screen time that Hinata, which is kind of hilariously off...!) Stoic, but not unreactive, and also not Too Cool to be the butt of the joke.



All of which serves to further underscore that last quartet. I know I keep going on about it, but it's just so fracking WIERD.

[Ramza00]

Just double checking my memory. But at this point do we know if Sasuke can do the Shadow Clone Jutsu or is that a Boruto only feat that Sasuke has not shown yet? Well in the Boruto movie he did 8 shadow clones effortlessly (9 total people I assume 1 is the original.)

8 Shadow Clones with the Rinnegan means instant communication back to the original where you do not even need to wait for the shadow clone to die to be updated with the senses of the clones. Furthermore when shadow clone A is fighting someone, shadow clone B is observing their blindspots but also seeing the people they are fighting independently and thus you get multiple insights of their technique with sensing chakra and all that. Furthermore Sasukes other eye is the Sharingan.

As long as Sasuke has enough space to maneuver, there is no ninja he can't lose to if he fights in an intelligent way [aka like handicapped Pain did], you can literally reroute the amount of chakra each clone gets in a way a "normal" shadow clone user is not able to do so. [yes this is a little inferring but this is what Pain did with his bodies and with Itachi / Kisame dopplegangers.] Literally Sasuke has the exact toolbox to prevent surprises for his eyes sense chakra in ways that are not possible for other ninjas, he is a "sensor nin", and he has the ability to do shadow clone jutsu, and share instant information with the rinnegan.

The only thing Sasuke could possible lose to is bloodline limits for those are things much harder to sense and analyze on the fly but once again Sasuke should not be in a situation where he is close enough with his original body that this is an actual problem.

-----

Thus the only way for Sasuke to lose against a normal ninja is for plot stupidity, or it is not a normal ninja such as one of the space clan wizards, the Ōtsutsuki. Aka the clan who is gifted with awesome sensing abilities through things like the Rinnegan and other eye based doujutsus (and we know from Pain that he can sense chakra being transmitted over long distances such as Kabuto's Edo Tensei control technique.)