Negative Energy? Ha! OUR undead are fuelled by FUNKITUDE!

[geez3r]

Wow, just wow. This is one of the silliest things I've ever seen, and yet it could work really, really well in game. Kellus, take a bow, you did a really good job. This is very much bookmarked.

[DracoDei]

Haha. This is amazing.

One thing though, clerics of funky deities should be allowed to be square. Whenever someone's really popular, you know there are gonna some dorks who worship them. Literally, in this case.

Yeah, but how much do the deities support said dorks and acknowledge them as their representatives?

[knightsaline]

Kord is CGF? Kord is a god of battle, fighting and other manly things. He has no time to try and keep up with "whats hot and whats not". He wears a wrestlers outfit if he can. Wrestlers outfits don't look that good, (unless Galla has a thing for wrestlers)

On your scale, Artiema ( homebrewed god/goddess of change) would possibly be CGF and worship the ground Galla walks on, if Galla decides that its hip to walk. My other homebrewed God, the Omega Thunderstorm, would be CGN with leanings towards CGS, as he does not need to be "funky" and likes to throw lightning bolts at things.

Edit: Draco, those square followers of a funky god/goddess would be treated like the LE worshippers of St Cuthbert, ie, not accepted as true followers. they would only be able to use divine spells due to the "inner power" rule that allows pallys to gain spells from their own beliefs and not a god.

[Kellus]

Hey, wrestlers can be cool, right? Anybody?

But yeah, you're probably right. Kord's a deity that I really don't know that much about, so I winged it. I'll switch it to CGN, since I assume he's not a total square.

[knightsaline]

Would a rural cleric punching a heretic in the teeth count as a funky act? If it is, St cuthbert would not really care about funky/square axis. Pelor is pretty cool, his clerics invented sunglasses. Vecna would be Square, as he hates dancing undead. Ollimadara and Yondalla would be funky (olly because he is a prankster god and Yondalla because halflings worship the funk)

Now I want to try and make a CGF paladin of Pelor (possible if you allow UA's variant pallys and a clerics one step rule) who likes to remind everyone who will listen that without the sun god, there would be no light and therefore, no funk. no funk means everything is boring!

[Garatolla]

Is anyone else put in mind of the film Zoolander? I nearly died laughing picturing someone having a walk-off or break dance fighting with a zombie or something

[Peregrine]

Genius. Mad genius. I love it.

Oh, you changed Fharlanghn's alignment, but you still have him granting the Square domain. (I actually noticed this at first reading, before seeing the posts discussing his change to Funky. I'm a little Square myself, it seems...)

[firepup]

And no one remembers stubbs.... Cop rock!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PtaDL0qXCVE

I bow to your idea

[Chronos]

From your monster table:

Ooze Funky

So you're telling me that a gelatinous cube isn't square?

[TheLogman]

Of course not! He's all Oozey and squishy, he goes with the flow, he's cool. Plus, its not a perfect square, he defies squareness by being imperfect, making his own style.

[knightsaline]

and ghouls are funky X 2. funky because they can dance and because of their funky smell.

I just had to say that.

[Kellus]

Everybody who's anybody knows that oozes are masters of funk. Second only to dinosaurs, of course.

Good catch on Fharlaghn's domain, I missed that when switching him. Thanks!

[Danin]

It is quite clear that you put a lot of effort into this, I'm quite impressed.

Although a silly concept at it's core, you adress the proposition in a manner that is nothing but rational and entertaining. Most people simply throw out a couple of stupid lines and ideas before laughing themselves silly while were left to attempt to interpret their... perticular brand of english. I really am impressed, good job.

On a side note, you just gave me an idea for a character I have to make for a new campaign. Enter Razzle, the holy prophit of Funk! Complete with parachute pants and glammered lime green blazer.

[ObadiahtheSlim]

'Cause This Is Thriller, Thriller Night
And No One's Gonna Save You From The Beast About
Strike
You Know It's Thriller, Thriller Night
You're Fighting For Your Life Inside A Killer, Thriller
Tonight

[Human Paragon 3]

Monks should be allowed to be funky! First of all, Chuck Norris. Second of all, the idea of somebody wandering the earth trying to achieve cosmic funkiness is awesome. He'd go around smacking down squares and doing amazing slowfalling dance moves. Flurry of Blows could easily become a flurry of FUNK.

Great job, btw.

[Damage Control]

Yeah, but how much do the deities support said dorks and acknowledge them as their representatives?

Hey, they'll do their homework if they pretend to like them.

[mockingbyrd7]

This is awesome. I'd never use it, but it's still awesome.

My thoughts exactly.

[Goober4473]

I love it.

Makes me think what a more serious third-axis alignment would look like.

[Jaerc]

/ 's

This had be laughing for a good long time.

[monty]

Monks should be allowed to be funky! First of all, Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris cannot have an alignment. To give him an alignment would be to impose limits on him, and therefore make him less than Chuck Norris. He is simultaneously all alignments and no alignment, assimilating only the beneficial aspects of each one.

I never really saw him as a monk anyway. I'd go with the term "avatar of awesome," but that's still an understatement.

[Ilgivan]

I disagree with monks being square.

They do cool kickflips and know kung fu.

[Maldraugedhen]

I disagree with monks being square.

They do cool kickflips and know kung fu.

But they have to follow the rules, or their monasteries'll kick 'em out.

Forced Lawful alignment, I'd say, leans them towards Square as well.

[Darkantra]

At the very least monks should be allowed to be neutral in funk.

That brings up something interesting, should there be any mechanism for perceived funk? Anyone watching a monk run up a wall, jump off and circle kick an ogre would have to, by all of the planar laws of Funk, say "Damn!".

Perhaps for simply socializing with others, monks should be considered to be funky (maybe by gaining an influence modifier on diplomacy towards those who venerate funk?) but in their own meditations and advncement be neutral or square.

[monty]

Also, for those of you who have seen UHF:

Gandhi II. Now THAT'S funky.

[Ilgivan]

But they have to follow the rules, or their monasteries'll kick 'em out.

That's lawful, not square.

These rules may well include "be totally awesome in all that you do."

[Alex12]

Why are abberations Squares?
I mean, look at Beholders. You can't tell me that something that can shoot laser beams from its eyes isn't funky.

[SmartAlec]

I never really understood exactly where Bard magic came from. This system, however, explains it perfectly.

It's like reading the Theory of Relativity for the first time; suddenly, everything makes sense.

[DeadEnded]

Monks should be allowed to be funky! First of all, Chuck Norris. Second of all, the idea of somebody wandering the earth trying to achieve cosmic funkiness is awesome. He'd go around smacking down squares and doing amazing slowfalling dance moves. Flurry of Blows could easily become a flurry of FUNK.

Great job, btw.

And do not forget Jackie Chan ... obviously a monk and very funky .... have you seen some of his earlier movies???

[Kellus]

Why are abberations Squares?
I mean, look at Beholders. You can't tell me that something that can shoot laser beams from its eyes isn't funky.

Actually, laser beams and eating brains are pretty funky, so I guess I'll switch that.

As for the monk debate, I'm thinking of alternatives. I might remove the square restriction restriction, but honestly if there's a base class that's going to be square, it's the monk.

Ooh! Idea! They have to either be funky or square, and can't be neutral on the axis of funk! How does that sound?

[Ilgivan]

I can see that. They MUST take a stance on the funk axis, and cannot choose neutrality.


Sounds like a good compromise.